Hogan, my hero

Valentine's Day! It's all about the HEART!....

2011-02-13T21:39:00.000-05:00

Hogan's Heart was always the focus.

Hogan's Monitor

We watched this monitor every day. We began watching it when Hogan took his first breath and watched it until he took his last. I believe God was teaching us that it's our Heart that needs to be watched and guarded every day.

Above all else, guard your HEART, for it affects everthing you do. Proverbs 4:23

Wow, it's been a while since I blogged. I don't know why I haven't been keeping everyone up to date with our life. It might be because I have been a little depressed. It might have been because my heart just wasn't in it.

You can't help but know what the next Holiday it is.... if you walk through any local store, if you watch any television or get online for any amount of time.. you are reminded to remember that special someone on Valentine's Day! You can even get a pizza in the shape of a heart this year! It's because of these hearts that I wanted to blog tonight. It reminded me of the importance of your heart.

Hogan's entire life was about us focusing on his heart. Dr. Roesmond took extra time looking at Hogan's heart in our first visit. Hogan's heart had a hole in it. When Hogan passed away ironically, he left a hole in ours too. It was a different kind of hole. It was that secret chamber inside your heart that opens up with the birth of your first child. It is that other chamber that opens and allows a parent to love their second child when you never thought you could love another child like the first born. It was the next chamber that opened when you have your next child and just when you think to yourself, I can't love any child more or equal to the third.... bam! God allows this mysterious thing to happen, another chamber opens. I believe that God is showing us as parents that in the same way we can love one child, then two, then three.... that He can love us the same way. God loves me and he loves you too. We can't count how many of these secret chambers that rest inside God's heart. It is that same chamber that creates a vacuum when a child leaves early. There is more pain and heartache in that hidden chamber when a child dies that is equal to the excitement when that child arrives when that chamber is opened. I believe that hidden chamber that has a "hole"can only be filled by God.

I have been praying that God would allow me to help others. I want to ask you to pray for me too. I want to help other parents that are facing a decision about the birth of a child. I don't want to make the choice for them but I do want to be able to tell Hogan's story. Angie and I spoke at a Sunday School class at Hebron Baptist in Duluth, Ga a couple of months ago. It was our first time telling a group about our experience. I really feel like I let God down that morning. I got emotional and with that... I got flustered and lost focus. It was a great learning lesson for me. If I would have kept focus on the point... like I discussed in my first few blogs... then we would have done much better. Actually, I would have done better! My wife did awesome. She is an amazing woman. It was hard enough for me to experience Hogan's journey but I can't imagine Angie's feelings. My heart goes our to all of the women that stumble onto this blog that have had children and experienced a loss of a child. I have an opportunity to speak at a Church service in a few weeks and I would appreciate your prayers. I pray that Hogan's story might change the heart of someone in that service or that the message would remind parents to hug their children a little more often!

So, why am I writing this blog tonight??? I have no idea other than the fact that God has put it on my heart. I feel that on Valentine's Day, where the world has commercialized another day, that we should take the time to search our Heart.

Follow my advice, my son; always treasure my commands. Obey them and live! Guard my teachings as your most precious possession. Tie them on your fingers as a reminder. Write them deep in your HEART. Proverbs 7:1-3 NLT

I am so thankful every day for being able to have good health. I am so thankful for the blessing of a wife and two amazing children asleep in the other room. I am also thankful for the days we got to share with Hogan. Every day in that NICU with Hogan was such a blessing. It isn't ever too late for anyone. If you have a child or children and for some reason there is an issue between yourself and them.... I hope that you pick up the phone or drive to let your child or children know how much you love them on Valentine's Day. There is no excuse.

We are so thankful for your continued prayers for us. We can't wait to see Hogan in Heaven one day but we believe God has left us here for a reason. Enjoy every day and make memories every day. Every day is a blessing and every breath shouldn't be taken for granted. Happy Valentine's Day to you!

In His Love,

Kip

Wishing you a very Magical Christmas!

2010-12-25T11:01:00.008-05:00

Merry Christmas!

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

It is amazing what God has done over the past year in our family. We thank you for being a part of our lives and we can't tell you how much your comments, posts, emails, cards and prayers have meant to us. God Bless you and your family today. We are so thankful for the memories of Hogan. I am so thankful that I am able to type this Christmas wish from a warm house and that we continue to make memories today. We are very blessed.

Thank you for being a part of our lives.

In His Love,

Kip, Angie, Noah and Lily

Dreaming.

2010-11-04T05:58:00.002-04:00

HOGAN

Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all his had done. PHIL 4:6

For I can do everything with the help of Christ who gives me the strength I need. PHIL 4:13

Well, it won't be long until "remembertheone.org" goes online. I will meet tomorrow afternoon to see the website. We have been working on this website for a few months and it's finally about to happen!

I did something last week for the first time. I went back and read my first 2 blogs in order to have a "how it began" story on the website. The designers wanted me to write that story. It was amazing to read my post again. It brought back so many vivid memories and also helped me realize that Hogan was destined to be used by God.... but aren't we all?!? My first 2 blogs mentioned a website. It was a website I never really got off the ground because I decided to blog instead. This website was built (by me!) so it wasn't very good.... but that vision was born. That website was named "Hogan's Heroes". The motto for the website was "remembering the ones". This "remembering the ones" thought is still on my mind and in my heart today. Isn't it amazing that a little baby boy that had a condition called Trisomy 18 started this whole thing?

Although Trisomy 18 is known for being "incompatible" with life, Hogan was full of life. His life reminded me that every day on earth is a blessing. He reminded me that it doesn't matter how old, young, tall, short, rich or poor, you can make a difference. He helped me be more aware of not taking the future for granted. I never assume much anymore. If someone makes the statement "wait until"... well, I just hope we get there! Anyone can impact the lives of others. It is never too late or too early in life to choose to make a difference. Little eyes are always watching you. You can never love your children too much. I have never heard any of my clients say to me.... I wish I would have worked more when I was young or I regret spending time with my family. There might be some people that feel that way but I have never met them.

Remembertheone.org will be a place for anyone. It will be a website that will connect people with the same conditions, or life events. It will be a resource for the people that might want to connect with others or share their stories with friends and family members without having to pick up the phone. It is something that I feel is needed. It is something that has been on my heart since I started blogging. I blogged and communicated through facebook during Hogan's life. It wasn't always comfortable to put certain posts on facebook. The hope is to create an environment that will be a place to share a journey. I will not blog from this website once we go "live" with remembertheone.org. My plan is to continue Hogan's blog on the RTO's website. Hogan will have a page on the new website. Of course, his page will be a "memorial page". I will put the important dates on his calendar like the day we found out about Hogan, the day he was born and the day he went to be with Jesus.

The dream of the website is to be offered eventually in every hospital. Of course, this will take time. I believe that God will use this website. I have no doubt that God's love will be shown by the resources that someone will be given to build there own journey page. God is with everyone on their journey. Some journey's are tougher or harder than others. I especially like the calendar. If someone builds a journey page, that person will be able to blog, join group(s), contact others, follow others, have their own web address on the site and have their own calendar. For instance, if you or your friend has cancer, the journey page will allow this person to put a surgery date and time, or an event, or special day. Someone that follows this person will be able to get notifications of posts, blogs, and calendar events. If I am having lunch with a friend, I might one day get an email from RTO letting me know that someone I follow on a journey page is having treatment or a surgery. This will enable me to have options. I could send this person a message on the website, call, send flowers, pray or whatever my heart is led to do. There have been many times that a friend will let me know about someone that is going to have surgery. I will try and remember this date and time but I would often get busy and forget about it. This website will help remind me of those events! There will also be a "fan page" on Facebook... so please pass the word. I believe the fan page will be running next week. The website will be totally social networked. It will be easy to pass along a journey to others. Although the journey pages are recommended "open" for anyone to follow, there will be capabilities that would enable a private journey page. The private page will only being able to be accessed by invitation. I want the website to be able to be used by anyone! The "ones" will drive the website.

Please pray for the website, its developers, the board, and the people that choose to use it. Hopefully it will help many, many, many people! Although I believe it could be a huge success by touching many, it will be a success if it helps one person or family. I was the father of a special little baby that helped to change lives. Hogan changed my life and many others. He is the reason that this website is going to be available. If you are reading this blog. You are important. I want to ask you to help spread the word about the website. This website is the website for Remember the One, Inc. It is a non-profit corporation that has a vision to give people hope, help and comfort during a journey. It is also a dream to turn this corporation into a foundation one day that can help individuals that need it. Yes, its a big dream. I will never believe it can't happen. I will never believe that miracles can't happen. After all, I sat beside a 3 lb., 3 oz. baby that changed many lives. He was a warrior. This website is built for warriors like Hogan. He never gave up and fought until his final breath. My prayer is that this website will be helping lives long after I am gone.

Thanks for loving us through Hogan's journey and the websites journey so far. If you are reading this blog then you are a hero of Hogan's.

In His Love,
Kip

Getting closer...

2010-09-06T06:59:00.012-04:00

T shirts ideas that were sent to me from our web designer. I hope to be able to post the logo soon!

www.remembertheone.org (coming soon!)

"I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else" C.S. Lewis

We are getting closer to making this vision a reality. I have had a few meetings with the guys that are building the site and we have a logo and a design of the homepage. The next phase is to design the other pages. I was told this wouldn't take as long as the homepage design. Hopefully this website will be ready to help people in November or before.

This website will function with this domain: www.remembertheone.org The "one" in remember the one will be the "one out of X". It will be the 1 out of 100, the 1 out of 1000, the ones out of 10,000, etc. etc. I have no idea how God will use this website but I feel that is something that is supposed to happen. You will be able to search for someone by condition, name or town. Anyone will be able to create their own page. Anyone that creates a page will be able to connect with others with the same condition or situation if they wish. It will be a place will enable families and friends to keep up with important events in someones journey. If it weren't for the one's there wouldn't be a website. If it weren't for the one's then lives wouldn't be changing because of them. Thank God for the special people in our lives. I know that I would love to have Hogan sitting beside me as I type but I feel his spirit living inside me as if he was sitting here now. Hogan was used by God and I pray that his life will continue to help people and change lives through this website.

I continue to ask for prayers for this website. I see people everyday that could use this website. The one thing that was awkward to do during Hogan's journey was to put some of Hogan's information on Facebook. There is no doubt that facebook was a huge help during Hogan's journey but it just didn't feel right to me. I want to have a place that is specific to the cause. It will be intentional about connecting people that are walking through similar journey's. It will be a place that will give love and support to families that are in the midst of a difficult time in their life. It will be a place that someone can remember a journey of a loved one. I believe God can and will use this to change someone's life.

The website will be part of a 501c3 organization being started called Remember the One, Inc. I will be setting up an account next week and have already gotten commitments from Board members. A person will be able to donate to the website in different ways. You can give money to help operate the website with a normal donation. You can also give a contribution in honor or memory of a person. We will have an area on each "journey page" that gives someone an opportunity if they wish to honor or remember someone on the website. The money that is net of operating expenses will be used to help other charities. Angie and I want to help the "one's" financially if possible by supporting a core group of charities that's purpose is to help. I don't think that the website will cost much to operate initially and I am very thankful. Hopefully one day we will have so many lives being changed and helped that we will have to hire staff but we are going to give it to God and grow with it. Wouldn't it be a great problem to have to hire someone to help with the website one day?

Thank you for your prayers. Thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for loving us through Hogan's journey. I thank God for the "ones" in all of our lives.

In His Love,

Kip

Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is born of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God-for God is love. 1 John 4:7,8 NLT

It's about the One....

2010-08-26T20:37:00.006-04:00

Hogan Sayer Dominy

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from his love. Death can't and life can't. The angels can't and the demons can't. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can't keep God's love away. Whether we are high above the sky or in the deepest ocean, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38,39 NLT

I wanted to update everyone that fell in love with our son Hogan over the past year and let them know what is going on with us! We are moving on with life after Hogan. Of course, there isn't a day that goes by that Hogan doesn't cross my mind many, many, many times. I am sure this will be the case until we meet again.

Noah turned 4 on August 12th and Lily turned 2 on August 16th. They both started pre school again this week and the usual tears and fears that go along with your child have been gripping us this week. It is so good to see their smiling faces every day when I get home from work. I worry about Noah and how he views Hogan's death. He talks about Hogan periodically. He is extra worried about us leaving him. I want to think that it is because he loves us and is just being a normal 4 year old but I can't help to wonder what is going through his mind. We stress to him that we are coming back to get him but I wonder if he thinks that Hogan is somewhere left alone. We have told him that Hogan is with Jesus but I wonder if in his little mind if he thinks Jesus is sitting with a class of babies in a pre school somewhere looking after him until we can come pick him up. Noah released a few balloons after his party on Saturday. As he was watching the balloons fly into the sky he turned to me and asked "Dad, are we sending these balloons to Hogan?" Noah loved Hogan so much. I guess that is why even more of my hair is turning a lighter shade.

I ask for your continued prayers for us as we move through the fall and the memories of the diagnosis and the memories. Again, I know we are blessed and many, many people are in much worse shape but it doesn't take away the pain.

I can't thank you enough for loving us and for being so good to us with your thoughts, prayers, cards and the contributions to Hogan's Memorial area in the Prince Avenue Christian School. We can't thank you enough. You will never know how much this support carried us through Hogan's journey. Thank you.

It is because of this support, Hogan's journey that I have been inspired to start a website that I have mentioned in other blogs. This website is going to be a place that I hope a family can be touched like we were touched during Hogan's journey. It will be an area of hope, love and support for the one's. I will always remember the one. It's this one out of "x" that will never be forgotten. It's the one that will never be alone. It's the one person that I hope will never go through a battle feeling alone. It's the family that will be able to communicate with people all over the world that might be going through a similar battle. It will be a success if God uses this website to change or touch one life.

I have been so worried about the website not being good. I have been wanting to make it the best website it could possibly be and that God would use it to touch hundreds and thousands of people. I know it might. I know it could. I know that it isn't wrong to wish, hope or pray for these things but a strong peace has overtaken me in the past few days. It's the feeling that it's about the one that gave me peace. If that one person can be helped then this website will be a success in my eyes. We will never forget the one. We will never forget our one (Hogan). We will never forget the one's that are fighting for their life. We will never forget about the one that is abused, abandoned or neglected. We will never forget the one's that can't stand up for themselves. It's the one's that make the statistics. It's the one's that are special to me. It's the one that will be remembered on this website.

My vision is to enable families to build a website for their loved one. It will be as private as the family wants their website to be but it will also be able to be accessed by anyone if the family wishes. There will be a calendar on each website that will enable the family to update family and friends of important dates. This could be the next cancer treatment, the next surgery, the upcoming doctors appointment, the date the loved one is scheduled to come home or even a fundraiser for someone. The website will be driven by the people that use it. Someone will be able to blog, post pictures, communicate with loved ones and connect with others that are going through the same life event. I ask for your prayers for the website. The internet was a blessing to us during Hogan's journey. We used facebook and the blog to share Hogan's story. We were told by many people that Hogan's life gave them inspiration. Those same people were inspiring to me. Isn't it neat how God works!? Isn't it neat that the phrase "Remembering the One" can make your mind go to so many different places? I have shared this vision with a few people and each one of them thought that it would help a different group of people. I pray that it will be used for God's glory just like Hogan's life was used. I pray that this website and the people that might be here to operate it long after I am gone will stay focused on the "point" that Hogan was focused.

In His Love,

Kip

Developing a Warrior Mentality...

2010-08-06T06:42:00.008-04:00

Hogan and his warrior gear during his fight.

Noah had his first Taekwondo lesson last week!

I know this is going to be quite a shock to many of you that have read this blog. I wasn't voted best dressed, most athletic, cutest, etc. etc. (I am kidding!) at Dublin High School but I was voted the "best personality". I know that actually is a big shocker! I believe that God has quite a sense of humor too. Angie and I went to Dublin to celebrate a birthday of a friend a couple of weeks ago. We drove down on Saturday afternoon and attended the surprise party that night. As usual, my mother was more than happy to volunteer to keep Noah and Lily for us. The next morning we decided to visit Dudley Baptist Church with my sister Debbie. We walked into the Church and saw many faces that we recognized and many friends of Hogan during his journey. Like many of you that read this blog, these friends have been so good to us. We made our way to an open area and sat down to read the bulletin. The topic for the message was "Developing a Warrior Mentality". WOW.

Hogan's name means"young warrior". Hogan's entire life on this earth was about being a warrior. As you remember he was covered with accessories that made his little 3 lb. body look like a warrior that was in a battle unknown to many. It was a battle to live. It was a battle to fight. He reminded me of how not to take this life for granted. I often hesitate to mention the future much anymore. My job requires me to plan out retirement for my clients. My life revolves around planning. Isn't it a little ironic that God has put me in situations that require me to have total faith in Him? I don't mean that I believe we shouldn't plan or look forward to the future but I believe that we should do this with an awareness to not look past the present or take it for granted. I am in that battle everyday.

I have been mentioning a website that I am trying to get built. I hope that if you are reading this blog that you will pray for this vision. I believe that I am being led to do this. It was an amazing blessing to have you along with us during the journey. I believe that the journey isn't over but Hogan's journey has just taken a turn. He has inspired me to build a website that will be a resource and a tool that will be used by God to connect people. If you know of a person that has overcome a tragedy or that is going through something that has inspired you, please send me their story. If it's your story... send it to me. I am going to have a few featured stories on the website and then update the stories periodically that are on the home page. If you could please send me an email to rememberingtheones@gmail.com or sending me a message through facebook (Kip Dominy), that would be very helpful.

I feel that I am not a very emotional guy but I know that I have witnessed a battle for life. I have also witnessed a battle that ended in death. No, it doesn't seem fair but who determines what is fair in this world? Isn't it always in the view of each person? The one thing that is certain is that we will all die at some point. Some of us will die soon and some of us will die later. I am not trying to be depressing but just trying to be real. What will be said at your funeral? What will you want to be said? How do you want to be remembered? What do you think your children will say about your life if you passed away today? I think it is important to step back and think about these things. I was blessed to be able to sit beside a little boy that only lived 16 days and this little man made a bigger impact on this world than I could ever have imagined.

I was sitting in a restaurant in Dublin, Georgia having coffee before meetings yesterday and I saw an older gentleman leaving. He walked by my table and stopped to ask me if I was ready for my meetings (noticing my computer, etc. on the table). I told him that I was and then he wished me well. I thanked him and told him my name etc. and asked if he could tell me a story of anyone that he had ever known that inspired him or that's story stuck with him. He told me about a friend of his in Texas. He told me that his friend was a proud grandfather and that he and his little grandson were very close. He was blessed to see him very often. I haven't felt this love but I can see it through the eyes of our mothers as they love our children. I was told that this grandson had gotten very sick very quick and that death was emanate. He told me about how this grandfather was sitting beside his grandson during his last minutes of this earth. As his grandson laid there on the bed on this afternoon... he looked over at his grandfather and said "papa, it's getting dark, I will see you in the morning, ok?." These words would be the last he would hear from his little buddy. The grandfather's words after his grandson had passed away, "I can't wait until the morning". I can't wait to that morning either.

So think clearly and excercise self-control. Look forward to the special blessings that will come to you at the return of Jesus Christ. Obey God because you are his children. Don't slip back into your old ways of doing evil; you didn't know any better then. But now you must be holy in everything you do, just as God-who chose you to be his children-is holy. For he himself has said, "You must be holy because I am holy." I Peter 1:13-16 NLT

"Remembering the Ones"

2010-07-18T22:59:00.000-04:00

"You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it useful again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless. You are the light of the world-like a city on the mountain, glowing in the night for all to see. Don't hide your light under a basket! Instead, put it on a stand and let it shine for all. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father. Matthew 5:13-16

I hope this post finds everyone doing great. Thank you again for the comments, emails, messages, prayers and cards that you have sent our way. We are truly blessed and overwhelmed with your thoughtfulness.

Life never seems to slow down and it never seems to be easy. The one constant is change and that we can never go back and live today again. The one thing we can do is live tomorrow. It is never to late to change your future decisions. It is never to late to do things differently than you have in the past. I have no idea why this is on my mind so much over the past few days but it just seems there might be someone that reads this blog and needs a little encouragement. I know I need it often.

I named my last blog "decisions, decisions, decisions" because we make decisions every day that could have an enormous impact on our life. Some of those decisions might not seem big and some might not seem important but if you think about them... all decisions are important!

One of the decisions that I have made is to start a website that is going to "remember the ones". I am very excited about what God is doing right now with this vision. There is something that is telling me to do this. I believe that it will be a blessing to many people. I pray that God will use it for tremendous good. I started this blog in January with the "ones" on my heart and now I am going to finish the website. It will take about a month before it is ready to go "live" and I can't wait.

I believe that every baby born into this world is special and that every baby born into this world "different" than the norm is even a little more special. I know that I wouldn't have had this passion or drive to recognize the ones if it wasn't for Hogan's life. I believe that there are so many life stories out there that can inspire others.

I had lunch with a business friend of mine on Friday in Watkinsville at "Chops and Hops". I knew that my friend has lost his child at the age of 10 but I hadn't really asked many questions until Friday. My friend got married young in California. He and his wife had a child that had a disability. The child had a random condition that is very rare. She wasn't able to walk and she wasn't able to communicate much. She was only supposed to live a year after birth. She lived for 10 years. Her life was cut short by an accident. She loved water and was playing in her bath with a small amount of water. Her mother had gone downstairs to do laundry when she heard the water running. My friend's daughter was left handed and turned on the hot water by accident. This was a new house and they didn't realize that the water heater was turned up much higher than normal. She couldn't turn it off... by the time the mother ran upstairs to turn the water off.. the damage had been done. This precious little girl was badly burned. The mother called 911 and rushed her daughter to the hospital. The child lived for a while and was improving until one weekend when she turned much worse and passed away in her dad's arms a day later. I saw a picture of his beautiful daughter at lunch on Friday. I can only imagine the pain that he and his wife have to live. My friend is a special person and he had a special daughter.

This is another reason I am starting this website. I want to focus on parents and children that have beaten the odds or that are fighting for life. I am a healthy adult that has been blessed with great health so far in my life. I wonder if I am really giving God my best. I wonder if I can do more with the talents that I have been given. What is my excuse? It is never too late to change my life. It's never too late to make better decisions. I can't change yesterday but I can change tomorrow. I am so thankful for everyone that reads this blog and hopefully it isn't a waste of your time. Please pray that this website will make a difference in many lives and that it will be a good tool that will be used for good. I pray that God will use the website like he used Hogan's life on earth.

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions....

2010-07-11T05:32:00.001-04:00

July 4th at Bear Lake Reserve!

I stand silently before the Lord, waiting for him to rescue me. For salvation comes from him alone. Yes, he alone is my Rock, my rescuer, defense and fortress. Why then should I be tense with fear when troubles come? Psalm 62:1,2

I hope this post finds everyone staying cool during this hot summer! Angie and I went to the WNC mountains for the 4th and had a great time. It was actually a nice, cool weekend at Bear Lake Reserve and we were very thankful for time to relax and enjoy Noah and Lily. It was a big weekend for Noah because it was the first time that he didn't want to run screaming to the car or van to hide and get away from the fireworks. We drove over to Cashiers on Saturday night to see their fireworks with some friends of ours. I think being able to see other children playing and having fun looking at fire trucks and running around put Noah in a position to be able to handle the fireworks! He did great. Noah became an expert by the end of the night and was telling me which ones he liked the best. He even told me that the fireworks were made up of "rocks" and that was what was lighting up! I love to hear the things that little ones say!

I have no idea why this week was so difficult but for some reason Hogan was on my mind even more than normal. I always try to analyze things in my mind and maybe it was the fact it was the first time Angie and I had traveled to the mountains to stay at Bear Lake since we found out about Hogan last year. I put a few pictures of our July 4th trip on facebook and was thankful for all of the nice comments about our "family picture" and we were happy that night but isn't it interesting that although you smile and enjoy things that inside you could be hurting like nobody would guess. You just never know what someone is going through or what someone might have on their mind. I know we should be thankful for the time we spent with Hogan and I know that we have 2 other beautiful kids but it doesn't take away the pain sometimes. I believe you are either coming out of a battle in life or you are about to go into one. We are very thankful for our family and friends. We are so thankful for the people that read this blog and offer encouragement through comments, prayers, cards and phone calls. You have no idea how much it means to us.

I titled this blog post "Decisions, Decisions, Decisions" because we are always making them in life. We wake up in the morning deciding to get out of bed. We decide what to wear for the day. We decide what to eat for breakfast. We decide if we take a shower.... or not!? Hopefully you take a shower! You get the point I am trying to make. I mentioned some easy questions that we have to make a decision on every morning but they can also get very tough. I know because it seems I am always making what seems to me are important decisions! I can look back and see that some of them were good ones and I can look back and regret many that I have made as well. Some are pretty blatant that many people might know about while others are ones that I know were the wrong ones that nobody might know about. It doesn't matter how many people know what choices we make but the important thing is making a choice that honors God.

We are all human and are all going to make bad choices but if we pray about the little ones we will probably be in good shape to make wise decisions when it comes to the big ones. I mention this because many of you from Georgia that read my blog are either Georgia fans or fans that root against Georgia! UGA's athletic director made a bad decision a little over a week ago that cost him his job. Obviously, it wasn't a good one and if he could go back to that night I am sure he would now choose to make a different decision. It is easy to pick on him for making this decision but unless we were in that situation do we really know what decision we would make? The easy answer is "I would never do that"..... I think we are all human and that we could all make the wrong choice. Again, some choices are easy ones and some are tough ones. I have made many decisions in my life I wouldn't have wanted on the front page of the Atlanta Journal and I am sure that many that read this blog have done the same. The sad thing is that this probably happens many times in Atlanta and many other towns across our nation every night. It isn't easy to make some decisions. The easy decision is to "go with the flow" and make the decisions that honor others and that don't honor God. It's almost like once you decide to follow Jesus and honor God in your walk that you know that you will be tempted even more!

I have to decide that I will trust God in my walk every day. It doesn't always seem like it would be the most fun or the most exciting but every day that I make good decisions it is amazing how I feel at peace and have the joy that comes from honoring God. I had a dream about a week ago that I was sitting in a doctors office and found out that I had cancer. The doctor told me that I only had a year or two to live. I can't tell you how much that dream has been on my mind over the past few days. If you have actually lived through that diagnosis in real life or have been close to someone that has... my heart goes out to you. Although it was a dream it was real in my mind. It brought back memories of my childhood when I would wake up and it would take a few minutes to realize that the dream "wasn't real". It has been hard to decide to honor God over the past week because my heart has been hurting and because my natural instinct was to feel sorry for myself because of life events and because of Hogan's death. I could easily stick with this thought process and not be a good friend, father, husband etc. or I can decide to trust God and to honor God with my life. My desire is to be that good friend, father and husband no matter if I have one day left on this earth, 365 days or 30 years!

a couple of updates...

I wanted to ask for your prayers about the website and the book. I have gotten initial feedback on the book and am going to take the step that I was told to take. I am also getting the "remembering the ones" website started soon. This website will be to honor those babies, infants, toddlers and little ones that are special. These "ones" are the "ones" that are the "ones" in statistics. They are the 1 out of 1000 or the 1 out of 100. These are the ones that you might not think about unless you were part of the club. Hogan was one of these statistics. God used his little life to open my eyes to these "ones" and their families.

I do still miss my "guys night out" in the NICU with Hogan. I also miss writing my letters to Hogan and blogging from St. Mary's. I feel that God was with us through Hogan's journey and I pray that God will continue to be with us now that Hogan's journey took his last turn on April 18th. The thoughts that continue to inspire me to do great things are the things that Hogan showed me in his journey here on earth. When he was diagnosed I realized the only way to live was to focus on the "point" (Jesus). I also realized not to take anything for granted. I encourage whoever stumbles onto this post to live your days like they are your last days on this earth.

In His Love,

Kip

All their life in this world..... had only been the cover and title page: now at last they were beginning Chapter One of the Great Story which no one on earth has read: which goes on for ever: in which every chapter is better than the one before. C.S. Lewis, THE LAST BATTLE

It's Angie's Birthday today!

2010-06-29T07:58:00.000-04:00

Noah, Lily and Angie taking a break at a very HOT Atlanta Braves game!

Noah and Lily checking out something while playing on UGA's North Campus yesterday!

.....more fun on the University of Georgia's North Campus!

Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go. Joshua 1:9

I am excited that the Georgia heat is going to be a nice 90 today... that beats the 100 degree weather we have been having lately! We were able to take Noah and Lily to their first Atlanta Braves game on Sunday. We made it 4 innings in the heat but made some great memories. It makes me so thankful for air conditioning. We are so blessed. Speaking of being blessed... my wife turns the big 40 today! I know it is amazing because she doesn't look a day over 30. I told Noah and Lily it was "Mommy's Birthday" today and Noah said "Happy Birthday Mom.... can I have a cupcake!?".

Isn't it interesting the older we get the more we look back and see God's hand in everything. It isn't that everything was always the way we wanted it and there are often many things we wish we could go back and change or "delete" from our lives but those time are often the times that we grow in our faith the most. Those events can either make us decide to push away and blame God or pull us closer to God. Life events are like a roller coaster. If you aren't going through one at the moment but have just lived through what is considered a major one... then be prepared because there is probably going to be another challenge coming.

I wanted to let everyone know that there are some exciting things that God is doing with Hogan's legacy. A website is under construction for Hogan's friends. I wanted to ask you for your prayers. My prayer is that God would use this website just like he used Hogan on this earth!

I also wanted to thank the ladies that have teamed up with WeeCare. The gowns are amazing and are such a blessing. It is hard enough to say goodbye to your baby and this is one thing that is available now at St. Mary's if needed or wanted. If you would like to help with this ministry just let me know and I will tell you how to get involved. I was told that 5 babies passed away recently. I dropped off a bag of smocked gowns yesterday that Mrs. Jones gave me in Dublin over the weekend to be delivered to St. Mary's. I took them to the NICU and as usual, scrubbed down as I entered. It was good to see some familiar faces at the hospital. I had to battle my emotions as I talked to the nurses. I loved being there again but at the same time it was ripping at my heart because I wanted so badly to walk around the corner and see Hogan one more time. I mentioned how much I love taking pictures and love looking back at Hogan through pictures but I didn't realize how much being in the NICU again and smelling the soap on my hands brought back vivid memories and emotions.

Angie visited the library at Prince Avenue last week and things are moving along! Hopefully this project will be completed before school starts back. I will post pictures when it starts to shape up! We were also thankful that a local gym is going to dedicate a room in memory of Hogan. It will be a room where parents sit and watch their children while their children play in the gym. We are so humbled by how thoughtful and caring Hogan's friends have been to us. We even got an invitation to a little girl's birthday party recently that had a note in the invitation to bring a donation for Hogan's library instead of gifts for their daughter. I told the mother that Hogan would have wanted gifts for his friend but this was just one more instance of people going out of their way to be good to us.

I have also got some interesting news about Hogan's blog. I have been in contact with someone that might take the blog and turn it into a book. If this happens it will be stories from the blog and also information that I haven't put on the blog. I will tell that story one day if it happens. It was totally a God thing too. I mention the book because I would love your prayers about this too. I don't know if it will happen or if it won't but if someone can be touched or God can change a life through Hogan's story in a printed book then I want it to happen. I might be the only person that buys one but hopefully if it's printed, I can give them away!

Thank you again for being so good to us. We are so thankful for you.

In His Love,
Kip

Happy Father's Day!

2010-06-19T14:06:00.007-04:00

Proud Father

"You are the salt of the earth. But what good is salt if it has lost its flavor? Can you make it useful again? It will be thrown out and trampled underfoot as worthless. You are the light of the world - like a city on a mountain, glowing in the night for all to see. Don't hide your light under a basket! Instead, put it on a stand and let it shine for all. In the same way, let your good deeds shine out for all to see, so that everyone will praise your heavenly Father. Matthew 5:13-16

Friends,

I wanted to thank each of you for being so good to us over the past few months. We have been so overwhelmed with support through your love and prayers during Hogan's journey. We continue to be thankful for your care for us. If you ever know of anyone that is going through a similar situation with their child and you think we might be able to offer any help or support, please let us know. We would be happy to help in any way. We feel that we were chosen to love this special baby named Hogan and want to be able to help others. Again, thank you so much.

Over the past few weeks since Hogan left this earth to be with Jesus I have been trying to heal my heart. The void in that "hidden chamber" of my heart that God gives a parent with each child is still open and hurting. I try to go on with life like normal but it will never be "normal" again. Angie and I have been changed forever. I look at pictures and at videos of him and thank God for the time that we spent together. It is a hard thing to explain because I would never want to go through that trial again but I can see God's hand on his journey and the impact that Hogan made in his short life on earth is just amazing. I knew that God was big but God really has shown me just how big of a God we have! I try to go back to that place in my mind where Angie and I were basically living in the hospital with Hogan. I miss the smell of the hospital lobby. I miss the smell of the soap in the rooms of St. Mary's. I even miss the food at the hospital! It is interesting to me that my emotions are so "fragile" at times and then I seem in total control at other moments. It's that tender "chamber" that is still trying to heal. In the past I would sometimes drive past St. Mary's Hospital and think about the wonderful memories we have had there.... now... I drive past and St. Mary's and it is a battle of emotions. There are the happy moments that I am trying to hold... then there were the horrible moments of watching your son pass away in your arms while there is nothing you can do to help him or save him that come into your mind.

I look at babies totally different now. I have always looked at them and loved them but now it's a feeling of "wow" what a miracle. If you are reading this blog and have had a child then you know what I am referring too. It's the entire process. It's the moment you find out you are pregnant. It's the moment you hear the heart beat. It's the moment you see the first image on the ultrasound. It's the first time you find out if you are having a boy or a girl... then its the emotional roller coaster of the health of your baby. We are all beautifully and wonderfully made. We have two healthy children right now. We had one sick child that has gone to be with Jesus. Hogan's body wasn't "normal". It was special. Although he had many different characteristics than most children he was so beautiful in his own special way. I know that is the way God looks at each of us here on this earth. God doesn't make mistakes. Hogan was beautiful in his eyes. If you are reading this blog... You... are beautiful in his eyes too. I know sometimes in this world there are people that try and make others feel inferior because of their looks, money, etc. etc. but all of these things come and go.... the relationship you have with Jesus doesn't change. He doesn't ever not love you. We are unconditionally loved. I know I searched for happiness in my life for many, many years in all of the wrong places. I have learned that a person doesn't make you happy, money doesn't make you happy, an earthly "thing" no matter what... doesn't make you happy long term. It might give you happiness at times but nothing gives you the peace, true happiness, true joy, and freedom like having a relationship with Jesus. It is just like losing a child or having a child. Although you might try and imagine what it feels like... you really can't until you have gone through it. If you have never experienced a relationship with Jesus then you can't imagine what I am talking about.

I know that I have made many mistakes in my life and will continue to make mistakes. I have gotten many compliments on this blog and it does make me feel good but I know that the words on this computer are all inspired by God through a little baby named Hogan. If Hogan had not been a part of my life, I wouldn't be typing and I wouldn't be the person that I am striving to be today. I saw what God did with a baby with one ear, an over sized heart and small lungs. I saw how many people that God touched through Hogan's life. I continue to hear of lives that have been changed because of God using this little guy. Hogan was only 3 pounds. He only lived 16 days. Hogan's eyes lit up the room like a city on a mountain glowing in the night for all to see. If a little baby can change the world and make the difference that he made in a couple of weeks.... then why can't we?? I know I could insert a laundry list of excuses but there are really no good excuses.

I thank God every day for the ability to be a father here on this earth. I know it's a huge responsibility. I know it's a blessing. I know there are so many that struggle to have children and never get to experience the birth of a child. I don't take being a dad for granted. My heart is so heavy for women and men that have had to deal with this tragedy. My heart also breaks for the parents that have gotten to experience some of the moments I mentioned earlier in this blog and then to have their little one leave early to be with Jesus. I feel like every day is Father's Day. I am living a dream. I am healthy. I have been blessed with 3 beautiful children and the most amazing wife that God could have ever picked for me! Yes, we aren't the Brady Bunch... life isn't always perfect but all in all.... life is good. Life could be sooooo much worse. I don't have to look far to know how blessed our family has been and continues to be.

I love Father's Day. It is a day that I like to enjoy more than my birthday. There were many years that I never really thought I would get married or have children so the ability to celebrate both at the same time is such blessing. I got married later than most and have had children later than most. I believe that it is a blessing to me because I wasn't ready to be a husband or a father until a few years ago. I believe it was good for me to have these blessings a little later in life because I appreciate the gifts far more than I would have appreciated them earlier in life. I am so thankful for my friends that put their relationship with God first and that love their family more than anything on this earth. I have learned many lessons from these great friends. There was one basketball coach in my life that always said "remember" little eyes are always watching you. I think about that all of the time when I am around children, especially my own. I believe that no matter who you are that "little eyes are always watching". I know there were many father's along my journey in my younger years that had no idea the impact that they were making on my life. I looked to some of them for guidance. I watched how they treated their wife and their children (my friends). I am thankful for great dad's.

I have now lost my biological father and a child before the age of 38. I never knew either of my grandfather's. I know I am not the only person that has lived through the loss of a child and a father. I have thought about the different feelings that I had through each death. My father went into the hospital almost 2 years ago to have triple bypass surgery. My father kept telling me that he was going to be one of the 97% that survives this surgery. Hogan had a 1 in 5000 or 8000 chance of being diagnosed with Trisomy 18. They both didn't survive their conditions. They both died of heart failure. They both impacted my life but did so in different ways. My dad died at the age of 68 and Hogan died after 16 days.

I always wondered what it would feel like to lose a parent. When I was young it was my biggest fear. Now that I am older it was the loss of a child that I feared most. Hogan and my dad both passed away in a hospital. My father died in the ICU in Macon, GA after a battle and my son died in the NICU here at St. Mary's in Athens in a battle of his own. When my father was passing away in August of 2008, Angie and I were at St. Mary's welcoming our Lily Rose into this world. I experienced the birth of a child and the loss of my dad in a week. Lily was born on August 16th and dad passed away on August 22nd. I remember going down to Macon in the middle of the night to be there for my dad after getting the call at 4am that he wasn't doing good and would be rushed into surgery soon. I remember getting called into the "family room" and seeing the counselors and the ministers in the room almost 8 hours later in the day. When I saw the room filled with ministers and counselors, I knew it was his time to leave this world. It wasn't long before the doctor entered the room and said "he's gone".

I had so many mixed emotions when my dad passed away. I was upset because I knew that there would never be any more "time" on this earth to try and have a relationship. I was also sad because I knew that things didn't have to be "that way". My father always told me that I would have regrets when he died. I always wondered if I would have regrets for positions that I was forced to take on things. I always tried to do what was right and always felt like I was doing more than my part to have a father-son relationship although there were times along my journey that I had to make hard decisions. The only feelings that I felt at his death was that I didn't get to tell him that I loved him one last time before he was taken to surgery and the feeling of relief I felt when the doctor said "he's gone". I know that sounds horrible for those of you that have great relationships with your father but I didn't have a good relationship. Many people knew a different person and for that I am thankful. If you are reading this blog and you knew my dad as a friend, then enjoy your memories of him because my dad was a good friend to many. I am not writing this to "bash" my dad. He was far from perfect and so am I. I write this because it all had an enormous impact on my life and eventually Hogan's journey. I am also writing this because if you are a dad and didn't have a great model of a father, then you can change things. I am trying to change things for Noah, Lily and Hogan. I remember always praying that God wouldn't give me a son because I wanted the family name to end and I knew that I had no idea how to be a father to a son. It is hard for me to imagine thinking those thoughts now when I look into the eyes of my children and especially my first born son Noah who my makes my life so much better. He is an amazing blessing and he is the one that I pray will be the most amazing father to his children one day. I thank God for him every day.

One of the greatest honors that I could imagine is for my son to get to my age and want to be just like me or for my daughter to want to marry someone like me. I just felt the enormous responsibility of this desire as I typed those words.

I also thank God that all of us have a Heavenly Father. I tell Noah every night before he goes to sleep that I love him with all of my heart but that there is someone that loves him even more than me and his name is Jesus. If you ask Noah he will tell you that I love him "infinity and beyond". I hope he always thinks this. My desire is to love my children and my wife unconditionally. I know they will disappoint me and I will disappoint them along our journey together but the love will never go away. I will never "not love" my children. I always think about honoring Angie in a way that Lily will want her husband to honor her. Again, I screw up every day but these are my goals! I have learned that when I have my eye's focused on the "point" that Hogan and I discussed during our "guy's night out" in the NICU... that these desires are so much easier.

I am so thankful for my father friends that have impacted my life. I have asked a handful of them to help me with this blog. I thought it would be interesting and helpful to me and hopefully some of you that follow Hogan's journey to read their response to this scenario....

I have asked a few of these men to picture themselves in a room with their children. These men would know that they only had 2 minutes to talk to their children before they had to leave the room. These men would know that these words would be the last words they would leave with their children because once they walked out of the room they would never see them again on this earth. What would you tell your children in those two minutes? The responses below are from these men. I appreciate these men and their willingness to participate.

* Sons, I love you. You are both a gift from God to your mother and I. We prayed for you before you were born. In your lifetime remember to listen for God's voice and trust Him with all of your heart. Live the rest of your life doing the things you enjoy doing and help make the world a better place for others. I love you and I am so proud of you.

* Getting to be your daddy is the best thing God ever let me do. You are made just the way God wanted you, and He's the ultimate perfectionist. Love Jesus, your Momma and each other, and make sure they know it. All you can do is all you can do, and that's enough, you can't do anything more and shouldn't do anything less. When it comes to others, don't compare with them. In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing. Football is the greatest sport ever invented...... to watch! Go with tennis or golf, you can play them when you get old and more likely to live long enough to try... and... Ranch makes everything taste better!

* That I love them and always have no matter what, and that they should always seek God in all they do and to take care of their mother, each other and their extended families. Always do what you say you will, never take the short cuts in life, if you do you will miss out on a lot of experiences that make life exciting. Always surround yourself with Godly men who are real friends that want hesitate to call you out on the rug when you need it. No matter what is going on in your life never stop asking for and seeking the help of God and never give up because if you do, it will be the only time you really lose. Love your children like God loves you. Treat your children with respect and always discipline them consistently.

* Girls, always remember that the Lord is faithful. Live your life with conviction and obedience. I love you and will see you soon.

* "We've had a great life together. I have already taught you what you need to know. Let me just give you a few key words: REMEMBER, LAUGH, PERSEVERE, BALANCE, LOVE. Remember all that we have said and done together, including the teaching. Don't let the sadness of our separation rob the joy of our lives. Laugh often, and laugh hard! Laugh when you think of me. Laugh in the face of your troubles. Persevere. Don't give up. You know how to live. The question is, WILL YOU PASS IT ON? You must be intentional to pass it on. Balance has always been a big word for me. You can err on either side of the truth, so be careful of extremes. Look for the balancing truths of God's word--freedom and obedience, sovereignty and man's will, faith and works--these are examples. Keep your balance so you don't fall! Finally, LOVE. There are a lot of good things to do in life. Jesus said two are the most important. Love God with ALL you have. And love others just like and even while you love yourself. No matter what else you accomplish, you will ultimately fail if you don't love and God and love others. I wish I had done more, but I have accomplished God's overall purpose for me. Why? Because I love God and I love you all so much."

* I commit to doing these things and encourage you to do the same. To move from good to great in God's eyes I must; 1. Decide great decisions. (I have decided that Jesus Christ is the king of Kings) 2. Glorify Great God (Glorify God in all you do). 3. Commit Great Commitments (Commit to Believe God in everything) 4. Read Great Writings (Choose reading over other temptations emphasizing the Holy Word of God) 5. Think Great Thoughts (I will think more highly of God than ever before in my life) 6. Pray Great Prayers (pray without ceasing each day of my life) 7. Dream Great Dreams (I will dream of doing great things for God) 8. Speak Great Scriptures (Commit to memory key passages of scripture) 9. Love Great Loves (Love God and others) (Matthew 22:37-39) 10. Plan Great Posterity (I will give of my time and talents and material blessings for the remaining days God gives me)

In His Love,

Kip

WeeCare Ministry Information.....

2010-06-16T11:23:00.006-04:00

Dear Friends,

I have posted a letter with information on the gowns that are being made for the small babies that pass away at St. Mary's. Many of you have asked how you can get involved in this ministry......... This is an amazing blessing to families. I was told yesterday that 3 gowns were used in the past week at St. Mary's. God Bless you and thank you!

WeeCare Ministry

Many of us were greatly touched by the brief life of Hogan Sayer Dominy, son of Kip & Angie Dominy of Athens. Hogan was born at St. Mary’s Hospital on April 2, 2010, weighing 3 pounds, 3 oz., and left this world two weeks later.. His father Kip chronicled his life story on his blog (http://hogandominy.blogspot.com/). We all became very familiar with “Hogan, my hero,’ as he was called by his father. We cried over his daily struggles, rejoiced over his victories, and above all, prayed for this special family. Throughout his brief life, his dad called him a warrior.

A friend of the family from Dublin realized the need for a tiny gown for Hogan, long before his birth. She had heard through another friend involved with a ministry for a Macon hospital to provide special tiny gowns for tiny babies who don’t survive birth or live only a short time. She made 3 gowns for Hogan, and then enlisted the help of friends to provide these tiny gowns for their local hospital. WeeCare of Dublin / Laurens County makes the tiny gowns in different sizes, targeting 1 to 5 pound stillborn babies.

We would like to get a similar project going at St. Mary’s in Athens, in memory of Hogan. The Dublin project was modeled along the guidelines of the WeeCare ministry sponsored by the Smocking Arts Guild of America. SAGA provides free patterns for these bishop style gowns.

The website of the SAGA says it best. For more information, go to SAGA WeeCare.

SAGA members sew and smock simple bishop-style gowns and donate them to local hospitals to clothe babies who die at birth or shortly after. Many groups also donate smocked bonnets for premature infants. For a parent holding a dying baby, sorrow is often overwhelming. Life isn't supposed to end before it's really had a chance to start. In those moments, even the strongest have their faith tested. What comfort there is often comes in simple acts - an arm wrapped around grieving shoulders, shared tears, the gentle touch of a hand. At many hospitals across the country, comfort also comes in the form of small gowns lovingly hand-smocked by members of local smocking chapters. A social worker at one hospital stated, "We use them almost exclusively for babies that have died or are going to die. We're able to cover up a lot of the medical equipment with the gowns so that the parents get to see their baby looking great. Sometimes, the parents keep the gowns as a keepsake; sometimes, the babies are buried in them. I try to let the parents pick out which gown they want on their baby. Sometimes, it's the only parenting they get to do."

These patterns are all for smocked bishop gowns, but please keep in mind that a tiny gown of any type, sewn with love, will minister to these families. And, many times, even a tiny handsewn blanket to wrap around the baby can be used for those too tiny for a gown. Please let me know if you would like to help with this ministry in memory of Hogan to provide gowns for the babies who die at birth or shortly after, for babies born at St. Mary’s Hospital. If I can just get some help putting the gowns together (done before they are smocked), I can take care of the smocking.

Please call or email if you can help.

Love in Chirst,
Jill Langford
770-725-6281

and the thunder rolls.....

2010-06-10T17:30:00.012-04:00

Noah and Lily @ the Botanical Gardens in Athens, GA recently

Angie and Lily looking beautiful as always!

I was able to enjoy a little golf at the GOA convention last weekend!

I love this picture.... they both miss Hogan so much

I am blessed.

I wanted to post a few recent pictures of our family!!!

"So I tell you, don't worry about everyday life-whether you have enough food, drink, and clothes. Doesn't life consist of more than food and clothing? Look at the birds. They don't need to plant or harvest or put food in barns because your heavenly Father feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him then they are. Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? Of course not.

"And why worry about your clothes? Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don't work or make clothing, yet Soloman in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and gone tomorrow, won't he more surely care for you? You have so little faith!

"So don't worry about having enough food, drink or clothing. Why be like the pagans who are so deeply concerned about these things? Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs, and he will give you all you need from day to day if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern.

"So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring it's own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today.

Matthew 6:25-34 NLT

I thought this was a great passage of scripture that we loved while we were in the hospital with Hogan. It speaks to me everyday. I tend to worry about everything and especially tomorrow. Thank God that I am starting to not worry about tomorrow quite as much and enjoying today. Tomorrow might not ever get here for me!

Dear Friends,

If you are a friend of Hogan's then you are a friend of mine!

I hope this blog update finds everyone doing great! I know that it's summer in Georgia because the extended forecast calls for a 20% chance of afternoon thunderstorms for the next 3 months!!! I have been busy over the past couple of weeks and look forward to writing an update on what has been going on with our family in my next blog that I plan to write on Father's Day. The reason for today's blog is to ask you a favor!? I have some things that are very heavy on my heart and I strongly feel that God wants me to accomplish some things while I am still on this earth that were inspired by Hogan's life.

I would appreciate any suggestions on charities that deal with children/infant death or disabilities. I have a couple of local charities that I would like to help but I would love to choose one or two "world wide" organizations to support. God is continuing to bless me with opportunities to share Hogan's story and lives are still being touched by Hogan's Journey! My prayer is that God will continue to use Hogan's journey in a way that will honor and glorify Jesus long after I leave this earth.

I can't thank you enough for all of the cards, emails, calls, notes, prayers, and financial support that has been given to Hogan's memorial children's library section at Prince Avenue Christian School. I can't wait to put pictures up when this section is ready to be used!

I also wanted you to know about an amazing ministry that a few ladies in my hometown of Dublin, Georgia are doing in memory of Hogan. They are donating baby gowns they have made to fit babies who pass away at birth or that are very small and only live a very short life. I was notified by an email from Kem Mixon of St. Mary's today that a 1 pound 1 ounce baby had passed away. This baby was dressed in one of the gowns that the ladies from Dublin made for these very small babies. My heart breaks for the family that lost their baby. The feeling is still very real to me and I ask you to please pray for this little baby's family that had to kiss their little one for the last time on this earth today. It does warm my heart knowing that he has a gown that fits him perfect though. I know that little man was beautiful. It was such a blessing to have friends that made clothes for Hogan. We are so thankful. What a blessing to know amazing people that do such wonderful things. The ladies that came up with this idea are heroes to me. The ladies call the ministry "Wee Care" of Laurens County. I believe that a group of ladies in Athens are going to start making them too! This is what is printed on the card that is presented to the parents of these angels along with the gown:

This gown was made for your precious Little Angel with loving hands by the ladies of Wee Care of Laurens County.

Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.

I Corinthians 13:7-8

In Loving Memory

Hogan Sayer Dominy

April 2nd, 2010 - April 18th, 2010

Also, I appreciate your requests for prayer for loved ones. Please keep sending me your messages and prayer requests. Again, you can friend me at "Kip Dominy" on facebook and send me a message through that channel or you can send me an email to one of my email addresses: rememberingtheones@gmail.com or kip.dominy@wfafinet.com

Also, if you follow our blog and we have never met you "face to face". Please let us know who you are if we see you! We got a message from someone that recognized us from the blog but didn't say hello at that time. We would love to meet you!

I hope that everyone is having a great week.

In His Love,

Kip

Memorial Day 2010

2010-05-31T14:32:00.002-04:00

Therefore, since we have been made right in God's sight by faith, we have peace with God because of what Jesus Christ our Lord has done for us. Romans 5:1

"I do believe, but help me not to doubt!" Mark 9:24

How do we know what will happen tomorrow? For your life is like the morning fog.....it's here a little while, then it's gone. James 4:14

Dear Friends,

It feels like I have been in a race over the past few months. As you can tell by my pictures I don't run in too many races.. (obviously)! The races I have attempted always seemed like I started off trying to win the race but ended up just trying to survive to the finish! I think that is what the past few months of my life have been like. I have been just trying to survive Hogan's journey. The last turn Hogan took was on April 18th. I think the past few weeks have been my "recovery period". You know that time after the race when you look for water or maybe a banana and try to catch your breath knowing you have done something that was very difficult but that you finished. There is a mixture of pain and happiness in that moment. That is what I have been trying to do. I have been trying to catch my breath from an amazing ride that Hogan took us. God has used these past few weeks to let me catch my breath and to try and get refocused on life here on earth. I will admit, I have been distracted a little over the past few weeks as I have struggled to catch my "breath". Life is like a road race.

My last blog was a turning point for me again. I have been trying to figure out if God wanted me to keep blogging or not and if I was going to keep blogging, just how I was going to do it! I loved writing letters to Hogan and I wrote a couple after Hogan left to be with Jesus but it just doesn't feel the same. I have decided to keep the blog going and to keep updating what is going on with our families life now that Hogan has departed to a better place. It doesn't change the fact that it hurts like nothing else when I think about not being able to hold him or kiss him again but I try and step back and look at the "bigger" picture and focus on what God did and is doing through that little Warriors life! My prayer is that Hogan's legacy will continue to bring people closer to Jesus and to change lives for the better. I know he has impacted my life like nothing else and he is a reminder of just how precious we should take each day!

My job involves a good amount of travel and this morning I drove to Atlanta to go on a trip with a good friend and client of mine. The drive to Atlanta is not one of my favorite trips to make but it is a time when I can clear my mind. I started thinking about how fast life moves and how fast things change. Although it has only been a few weeks since Hogan passed, it feels like it has been a year to me. I was nicknamed the "paparazzi" at St. Mary's Hospital because I took so many pictures while Hogan was in the NICU. It was true.... because any time that Hogan got to be taken out of his isolette, I was there waiting to take pictures like photographers wait to take pictures of celebrities in Hollywood! I know the nickname was probably appropriate! I am so thankful that I got to take those pictures. I look back through them often and live those moments again in my mind. I know I can't go back to that time physically but I can almost get there mentally through these pictures. I have easily over a thousand pictures of Hogan and I still wish I would have taken just a few more!

I mention taking pictures because photography has always been a passion of mine. I helped out at a local TV station in middle Georgia about 15 years ago and loved it. Shooting camera shots and video is one of my favorite things to do. Hogan's life has inspired me to get back into this art. I have been able to get some great equipment and have learned many things from some talented photographers. I am also taking night classes at UGA this summer to try get better at this love of mine. I enjoy taking pictures of "things" but I love taking pictures of people and things together, especially sports or candid photography! I mention all of this because being in the hospital sitting beside and holding a little warrior like Hogan has made me want to be the best I can be in everything. I never really thought I had any talents but God has been able to open my eyes to a few possibilities that I want to pursue. The reason I love taking pictures is because it captures the moment. A friend of mine always says "make a memory". It doesn't matter what we are doing or where we are... he says "make a memory". I can't explain how much that "make a memory" comment comes to my mind every day. Life is about making memories and making an impact. That impact can be a good thing or a bad thing. I pray that I can make a positive impact and that God will use me like he has used Hogan. The moment a picture is taken, that moment will never be able to be brought back in real life. It is truly a memory. The people will never be that "old" again and that image will capture life at a moment in time that can be cherished.

I mentioned I like video too.... well, a couple of weeks ago a friend of mine in Atlanta called me about an opportunity to hear a story about an independent film that is being made here in Georgia. The meeting was going to be at his office to hear about it. I went because my friend wanted me to be there and because what he mentioned about the story was intriguing. I sat in a conference room overlooking downtown Atlanta and listened to the presentation. My heart was touched by the story. This movie sounds very interesting and I think it has a chance to change lives that will honor God. I will mention more about it as the production gets going later this year!

I started this post on Thursday while I sat in the Atlanta airport waiting to fly out of town and I am finishing it today, on Memorial Day. As I drove home yesterday I thought about how people are all different. As I drove down I-85 and looked around and it was hard to find 2 identical cars. I also easily noticed that not many people were driving the same speed or wanted to be driving the same rate of speed! Isn't it funny that if you are in a hurry and driving a little faster than normal everyone is driving too slow... but if you are taking it easy and someone comes zooming past you.... they were driving reckless. I believe that we are all living life at different speeds and in different ways through our own journey. Our relationship with Christ is personal. It is just like the car we choose to drive and the speed that makes up comfortable. We are all on our own journey! I am thankful for a great road map called the Bible. It's the perfect navigation system. The directions never change and never have to be updated. I pray that our journey will bring us closer to Jesus and that if someone doesn't have a road map or is lost that someone comes along and helps that person get back on the right path. I am so thankful for the friends that have helped me stay focused on our "Point".

I briefly mentioned how I travel often with my job. During this time when our economy is not strong. I am very thankful to be able to have a great job. I am also thankful that markets were calm during the Hogan's journey and especially while we were at the hospital with him. My partners and office staff were so great to me during my stay at the hospital. I never worried about anything while I was there because the common theme was "don't worry about anything, we are taking care of everything". They wanted me to enjoy every moment with Hogan. I am so thankful that I was blessed to have this opportunity. Hogan's life reminded me just how fortunate I am to have such a great office and great clients. It's easy to go through life and take things for granted sometimes. I am trying to never take anything for granted anymore. I had never tried to do this in the past but now it's even more of a passion.

I mentioned making memories.... well, yesterday on my way back to Atlanta I went through the normal routine at an airport. I checked my rental car back in to the company and then went through the ticketing process. I noticed as I walked up to the computer that a couple had walked up beside me with a beautiful little baby. I am not an outgoing person by nature so I didn't say anything to them but in my mind I was wondering if this baby could have been born the same day Hogan was born. I walked off to go through security and got a cup of coffee while I waited to board the plane. I never saw the couple in the airport after our brief encounter at check-in. It was about an hour later when the attendant called our flight destined for Atlanta to board. I couldn't wait to board the plane and get back home to see Angie, Noah and Lily. I walked through the aisle of the plane and looked for my seat. I was sitting seat 9B which is the one 2nd from the window and on the aisle of this particular small Delta jet. I looked over the right of me and noticed there was the couple that I had noticed at check-in sitting in seats 9C and 9D . They were already seated holding their little angel. Needless to say it was one of the longest plane flights of my life. It wasn't long in time but it was long because of my heavy heart. I glanced over at that little girl and imagined Hogan being in our arms. I imagined that Hogan would be the same size if he were still alive. I can't explain how bad I wanted to kiss and hold their little baby! It hurt me so bad and at the same time it warmed my heart to see this couple loving on their beautiful baby. I couldn't help it... when we had landed and were about to leave the plane, I asked the father how old their baby was... he said "3 months"... the baby was born on March 2nd. She was born exactly a month before Hogan. The couple was on their way back home in New Jersey after visiting family in Alabama. I told them that their baby was so cute and congratulated them. You could easily see the love for her in their eyes. They were "making a memory" in their life. I pray that we all "make memories" that honor God and that we enjoy life and live it with a passion that it might be our last day. Thanks for continuing to be on this journey with us.

In His Love,

Kip

It's been over a month now...where do we go from here?

2010-05-23T23:43:00.001-04:00

This is a picture of a drawing that someone did for us of Hogan in the hands of Jesus. A friend took a picture of Hogan off of this blog. We will treasure this forever!

Hogan holding my finger a few hours before he went to be with Jesus.

Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen, it gives us assurance about things we cannot see. Hebrews 11:1

Whatever is good and perfect comes down to us from God our Father, who created all the lights in the heavens. He never changes or casts a shifting shadow. James 1:17

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path you take. Proverbs 3:5,6

Dear Friends,

I wanted to thank you all so much for loving us and for loving Hogan so much.

I can't express to you how much your messages on this blog, the cards in the mail and the messages that have been sent through my facebook page have meant to me. I am having a really hard time figuring out what God wants me to do now that Hogan has gone to be with Jesus. I have started about 20 posts since Hogan left this world and I have only posted 2 of them! I don't really know why I can't write my blog post like I was doing over the past few months. It is a strange feeling because I get almost through with a post and then my mind just goes straight to Hogan and the hurt just rips my heart out and I can't post or finish the post.

I know that might sound stupid to many of you but I wanted to update everyone to let you know that we are picking up the pieces and trying to live in this world "after Hogan".

Angie and I went to the mountains for the night last night. It was the first night away our kids since they have been born (other than when Hogan was in the hospital). We probably needed to get away for the night but the moment we walked in the door tonight, reality hit! Noah and Lily both came running down the hall to say hello and to welcome us back home with smiles and hugs. The first thing Noah asked us was "did you bring baby Hogan home?". He assumed that we had been at the hospital with Hogan. I can't tell you how much it broke my heart to hear him say those words but at the same time those words made me realize the impact Hogan made on Noah as well. Noah loved Hogan so much and doesn't understand why he isn't here with us. The truth is that I really don't understand why Hogan isn't here with us now either. We will probably never know. All we can do is trust God like we trusted him during Hogan's journey while he was alive on this earth.

Thank you all so much for loving us through this time in our lives. We are so thankful for all of you.

I am going to continue to blog because my heart still feels the way it did in January when I started blogging. I don't know if this is for me, my family, a friend, a stranger or someone that might go through a situation like this. If one person can be touched by Hogan's journey and it brings them to a closer relationship with Jesus then it's worth it!

In His Love,

Kip

Mother's Day 2010

2010-05-08T18:27:00.014-04:00

Angie loving on Hogan in the NICU at St. Mary's in April 2010.

We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. Romans 5:3 NLT

Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. Psalm 73:23-26 NLT

Those who know your name trust in you, for you, O Lord, do not abandon those who search for you. Psalm 9:10 NLT

Dear Hogan,

I wish I could have communicated this with you when you were in the NICU with me hanging out for our "guys night out". I miss you.

It has taken a little while to get through some storms that have come since you left this earth. We love you and we have our faith in Jesus. We are thankful for the time that we got to spend with you on this earth but it still doesn't take the pain away. Hogan, I know people go through so much worse events and we are blessed to have spent some special time with you. You are in Heaven. You have a perfect body. We know all of this but for some reason that "chamber" in our hearts is still empty. We are praying that God will help heal that hidden chamber.

I wanted you to know that the "Hogan's Heroes" children's library at Prince Avenue Christian School in honor of your life is in the works! Your mother and I are meeting with the school on Wednesday to see what can be done. We are so thankful for all of your friends that contributed or prayed for this to happen in your honor. There have been so many cards, notes, prayers, contributions to charities in your honor Hogan. You impacted so many lives and for that I am so thankful.

We will celebrate mother's day tomorrow here. I know it will be tough on your mom tomorrow. She misses you so bad. Your sister and brother have gotten her a surprise and worked on a card for her! I wish you could have been here to celebrate with us.

I have been thinking as usual about your life and remembering things about your journey. Since tomorrow is mother's day I started thinking about all mother's in general. I believe that to be a parent of a child is one of the most unbelievable gifts that someone can experience. My heart goes out to those that can't have children. I can't understand how a mother of a child or a father of a child can't believe in Jesus. All babies are miracles. The birth of a child and the development of a child is nothing short of amazing. I have had to visit the hospital a few times since you left this world and when I step back into St. Mary's it feels different. I can't really explain it but it feels different. There are so many mixed emotions. There are always babies being born and happy faces all around. I pray that parents don't take a healthy baby for granted. I know I did until last year. It makes me want to go tell them all of your story so maybe they will hold their baby a little tighter or love on them a little more than they might would have otherwise.

I will never forget Dr. Rosemond standing up on that Thursday afternoon in November of 2009 and telling us that you had some things on the ultrasound that concerned him. Hogan, it brings tears to my eyes to think back on that day. It was at that moment that your mom turned into a child in my eyes. She turned into your "papa's daughter". She wasn't my wife for a few minutes. I looked at her and I saw a little girl that's heart was broken. I will never forget looking at her on that table and my heart being broken. It wasn't only for her but it was for both of you. I had feelings that were so torn. I hurt for you and I hurt for your mom. I felt so helpless. There was nothing I could do but pray to God and try and comfort your mother.

I had the same feeling the early morning hours of April 18th. Hogan, when you passed away, your mother turned into that little girl again in my eyes. She held you for a long time after your heart had stopped and your heart stopped beating. She kept talking to you and holding you tight. You looked like a baby doll in her arms. It was only a few hours later that we were home and Lily was awake. She was walking around the house with a baby doll. Hogan, it is just one of those things that most women are born to do and that is to love a child. In my mind I thought back to your mom's early years and how she probably did the same thing. Your mother is a special woman. She is a gift from God. I pray that all mother's will be honored and treated special tomorrow and I pray that all mother's realize the gift that they have been given.

I hope that all the mother's that stumble across this blog have a great Mother's Day tomorrow and every day after tomorrow!

I love you.

Remembering the ones...

2010-05-02T22:20:00.003-04:00

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalms 34:18 NLT

Dear Hogan,

It sure is strange typing these letters with you not laying in front of me in your isolette in the NICU at St. Mary's. The more I think about your life and your journey the more amazed I am. You helped me realize just how big of a God that we serve. I heard somebody thanking God for all of the great things that were going on in their life recently. They finished there statement with "God is good". What if things weren't going so great for someone? Would that same person name off all of the bad things that were going on in their life and say "God is not good"? I would hope not! God is good all of the time. It doesn't mean that just because you are a believer that you won't have any problems. It doesn't mean that you won't have a baby and have that baby die of a condition called Trisomy 18 or something similar. It doesn't mean that you or someone you love won't be diagnosed with cancer. Hogan, I love you and miss you so much but God is good. I don't understand why some things happen and probably never will but God is good.

I wanted to let you know how honored we were that Mrs. Peacock spoke of your life at the March of Dimes baby walk here in Athens on Friday night. Angie, Noah, Lily and I were there to support the event and to honor your life along with the other babies. You would have loved being there! Many of your friends from St. Mary's were there along with Hairy Dawg, some big bear and a dinosaur from Publix... he was Noah and Lily's favorite!

I have been thinking back on your journey. Hogan, we honestly weren't planning to have another child. You were a surprise to us. I remember your mom was having some thyroid problems. I went to Kroger to buy pregnancy tests one night to see if it was thyroid or baby!?! The test confirmed it was a baby! We were shocked at first. I honestly thought nothing but negative thoughts for the first couple of hours. I am so sorry for thinking about the long term and all of the responsibilities that come with another child. I think it is natural for a man to think that way but it's no excuse... I should have been thankful from the first moment! I walked into the living room and just sat there for a while. I was so overwhelmed. I told Angie that we would have 3 kids in college at the same time. I told her that we would have 3 of this and 3 of that.... I was so selfish in my thought process. It didn't take long for Angie to open my eyes. She said "honey" we aren't guaranteed anything in life. We might not be here for the birth or for college and our kids might not be here either. We can't assume anything. Hogan, I thank God for your mother opening my eyes. It was at the moment that I realized she was totally right. It was a turning point for me. I also thought back to the Hotel Indigo in Scottsdale, Arizona. I thought to myself, God might use this little baby for a special purpose. I had NO idea how special this baby (you) would be. My thoughts soon turned from nervous fear to thankful anticipation. I thought that it would be nice to have more diapers strolling through the house. I also thought that God was going to let me enjoy this birth because I was not able to enjoy Lily's birth as much because I was preoccupied with the death of your grandad (my dad). It turns out that God did allow me to enjoy your birth. I never took one moment for granted. I pray that I will never take any moment for granted again. You are always on my mind Hogan.

I also think back on many things that were interesting along the way. A friend told me one day that although we pray for healing at certain points that death always comes back. It's temporary healing that we pray. Another comment that I thought was interesting was... isn't it funny that all of the abortion supporters weren't aborted. I have never heard from one child or adult that was aborted to hear how they stand on the issue. I have said this before and I will say it again, I am thankful that our family gave you a chance and we are so thankful for the memories and the life lessons that we have learned from God through you.

I thank God for you because now I can remember the one's like you. I can enjoy the "ones" that I talked about in my first blog and I can also relate to the families so much better. I wasn't comfortable for whatever reason with "ones" before you were diagnosed. I have no idea why that I wasn't but it's not that I didn't want too... it was just uncomfortable for me. Hogan, you rocked my world and turned that feeling upside down (thank God!). I now see true beauty. It isn't the people that are on the front of national magazines. It's ones like you! I am not saying that there aren't great people on the front of those magazines but it's just that you never see the "ones" like you! Your story is special. God used your journey for good.

Noah and Lily love looking at your pictures around the house. They love you so much.

I miss you and will always love you Hogan.

Memories of Hogan's journey.....

2010-04-29T00:28:00.000-04:00

Angie is ready to have this beautiful baby boy Hogan!

Hogan Sayer Dominy (God's Little Warrior!)

Good Memories!

Hello World!

Thankful!

Hogan's eyes that could light up the city!

Hogan was a fighter!

"Our Angel"

A very interested older brother (Noah) and little sister (Lily)

Happy to see Baby Hogan!

Wow! Baby Hogan is here!!

Thank you God for this memory!

Lily wanted to check out her little brother!

A proud mom with her miracle baby!

What is faith? It is the confident assurance that we hope for is going to happen. It is the evidence of things we cannot yet see. God gave his approval to people in days of old because of their faith.

By faith we understand that the entire universe was formed at God's command, that what we now see did not come from anything that can be seen. Hebrews 11:1-3

Dear Hogan,

I sure do miss you!

Hogan, you were an amazing little baby. God had a plan for you during your short life and I know that you are now in a much better place. You are in a place that we all want to be some day! I know that as I have mentioned to you before... Heaven has a new face now than it did a few weeks ago. I have got to see you again. I don't want to miss out on today or wish time away but I am not going to be upset one day when God's plan calls me home.

I wanted to thank all of your friends for all the kind messages, the many prayers for our family, and the continued prayers and thoughts. We can't thank your friends enough for their kindness. I have started about 8 different letters but haven't posted any of them until tonight. This letter is "new" and different from the others. I think I am going to write you letters periodically and let you know what is going on with our family. I will also update you on how God is continuing to work through your 3 pound body. Although you have gone to be with Jesus in Heaven you will never be forgotten!

Hogan, everyone that has stumbled onto this blog has done so for a reason. God has used your little life for His glory. God used you to change our family in a good way. Yes, it ripped my heart out and it continues to hurt because I miss you so much but I know deep down that everyone will have the same fate one day.

I have been thinking back on our journey together. It is clear to me that God is a good God. He is a loving God. I believe that the closer I am to God that the more I saw Him working in your life. Isn't is neat how that always happens! The closer our walk with Jesus by our side the more we see "Him" at work!?

I was so happy that so many of your friends showed up at your visitation and your funeral. The visitation was very nice. You had a long line of people that were all telling us about their life being better because of you! Although it was nothing like being in the NICU with you, your little body looked great that night. You were dressed up like the best looking little baby warrior I have ever seen. Your mother picked out a beautiful casket and we had "dog" and your car beside you. The only good thing about your little body being there was being able to admire your little face without all of your tubes. Hogan, you looked great.

Your mother and I also were thankful for your friends that came to celebrate your life at the funeral last Wednesday. The weather couldn't have been any better. It was one of the toughest days since saying good bye to you on Sunday morning but your mother and I made it through the day. I believe that we both were so exhausted because of lack of sleep and the emotional roller coaster that we have been riding with you the past couple of weeks. I was thankful that I was able to pull a video together that I titled "Hogan's Journey" to be played at your service. It was something that I wanted to do in your honor. Hogan, you might have only lived 16 days but the time you spent on this earth will be remembered forever. You brought people together to pray that didn't normally pray. God allowed you to help people grow closer as a family. God also used you to help kids that are only a few years older than you pray and learn about your condition. Hogan, I am so thankful for your life.

I can't wait for you all of your friends to meet you again one day but until that day comes I think we should try and focus on the lessons that God showed us through your time on this earth. Your were a warrior that never took a day for granted. You woke up enjoying that day and focusing on enjoying the simple things. Your heart was too big for your little body so eventually it cost you your life. You had a huge heart that was full of love. I believe I need to focus on my heart too. I don't think your mission here was to tell us to eat right either. Although that is important, your heart was the issue from the beginning. I believe as a Christian that our heart should always be the focus. It's not about what people see on the outside. It's all about what is on the inside that counts. I believe that you were used by God to show many important "life lessons" like this! I hear things every day that make me think about you Hogan. I will never forget going to a local Kroger the morning after you went to be with Jesus. I said hello to the cashier as he slowly slid my items across his scanner. I asked him how he was doing and in a very depressing tone he said "I'm alive". Hogan, it was all I could do not to "go off" on him. I just smiled at him and said "it could be worse". I believe that most of us can say that about our life situations. I know we, as a family, went through a very difficult time with you over the past few months but it could have been worse.

Hogan, I am so happy that you are with Jesus. Yes, I want you here with me and it makes me sick to think about not holding you or seeing your little eyes looking at me but it could have been worse. I thank God that you weren't 18 and a non believer and died. That would have been much worse. We have been blessed with three beautiful children. You are with Jesus. Now, we have to pray that Noah and Lily will be there one day too. We are going to enjoy every day with them just like we enjoyed the days with you Hogan. We will do that in honor of your life. I know we would have tried to do this before we were blessed with your life but I have no doubt that enjoying Noah and Lily are even more of a priority now. Thank you for opening my eyes to see things more clearly.

There are many things that are "ironic" or things that make me think our God has an amazing sense of humor. I was sitting in a hotel room in Scottsdale, AZ on a business trip last November. I had finished my meetings early on Thursday was very bored. I couldn't get an early flight back to Atlanta so I just hung out in Scottsdale that afternoon. I remember just thinking to myself and praying... asking God to give meaning to my life.... I asked God to show me if I had any talents and for any talent to be used for his glory. I had never had a feeling that God used me for good. I am a financial advisor, not a "full time" minister. (that is another letter later Hogan!) All of this took place at a neat little hotel called the "Hotel Indigo". I will fast forward this story a few months. We have just planned the visitation and the funeral. My mother asked if she could help us find a place for the family and friends from out of town to gather to have lunch after your service. She talked to our office and they discussed different places. I was told later that they found a place that would host the lunch. That location was the "Hotel Indigo" in downtown Athens, Georgia. I had never been there before. I think this is a little ironic. The place where I cried out to God in Arizona, before we found out about Hogan's condition, was the same hotel that we had our lunch here in Athens after the funeral and graveside. I mention all of this because I feel it is ironic because I prayed that God would would show me any talent that could be used to glorify him. He did something much greater than any talent I might have been blessed. He blessed me by letting me sit beside a little warrior named Hogan Sayer Dominy. He blessed me by allowing the opportunity to watch Hogan help change lives in many people that have never met our family. If you have been blessed with children then you know the feeling when your child does anything that makes you smile. Hogan, you made me smile many times. I love looking at your pictures and watching your videos. God allowed me to be by Hogan's side on this journey. He also allowed many others to join the journey. God is so good.

One last thing...I also wanted you to know that many of your friends have donated funds for the "Hogan's Hero's" children's area for the library at Prince Avenue Christian School! It was a great idea by a friend of yours. Hopefully your older brother and sister will be able to enjoy reading with classmates there in a few years. It will also be something that will last forever! I pray that God will continue to use your story and your life. Hogan you beat the odds. You fought like there was no tomorrow. I pray that I live my life as passionate as you. I thank God for your life. I also thank God for every breath.

I will always love you!

Thank you Hogan, thank you friends, thank you God....

2010-04-18T23:58:00.007-04:00

April 2nd (Hogan's Birthday!)

Our "Angel" the warrior

One amazing little baby, one amazing woman.

Hanging out with "Dog" under the lights

"Grandma Hogan" getting to hold Hogan

Nana Skelton and Papa Skelton holding Hogan

Bright eyes.... Hogan and "Dog"

Proud Parents!

Hogan, My Hero

Big Brother Noah loves Hogan

Thank you

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13

Dear Hogan,

Good evening little guy. I sure do wish I was back in the NICU having our guys night out right now with you. Thank you for giving us a complete day to hold you before you had to leave. It was not easy to walk back into St. Mary's and clean your room out today. I loved being there with you over the past 16 days.

We all know that our time to leave this world will come but yesterday we saw a few hours before you left that you wanted to say goodbye to us. I am thankful that your mother and I were able to kiss your beautiful lips yesterday! You have amazed many people for over two weeks and you continued to amaze them with your fight to live and impact lives until early this morning. I like that fact that you had a sense of humor all the way up until midnight. You played with your numbers on the monitors all day. Nurse Lisa came in to say good bye many times when you just wanted to say hello to her. Hogan, you know she didn't want you to leave either but we all noticed that you were ready.

We are so proud of you Hogan. I can't thank God enough for giving us these wonderful days to spend with you. Yes, I naturally wanted more time and I have never felt pain like I feel typing these words but I am focusing on our "point"! (And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28) I am so thankful that I got to be your dad here in this world. I was honored to hand you over to your Heavenly Father last night but it hurt so bad. I know you are in the best hands now! I thought I did the best I could for you on this earth but now you are with a perfect Father!! You have no more cords coming out of you or attached to you! You have probably met many of our friends that have gone ahead of you. I have met many other families that have lost children during our journey together and I am sure they are all happy to have you there. You are a special angel. You are a special baby that was sent here to make a difference in this world. You accomplished so much in your short time here.

Hogan, you were a great role model for young children! I know you heard me talking about all of the children that were praying for you and that were asking about you every day! I know you want those children to know that you are all better now. You want all of those children that sent you all of those sweet notes to know that you are now perfect! You are probably up in Heaven creating havoc like you did down here. I know that the doctors offices or the staff at St. Mary's won't forget your beautiful eyes or your sense of humor. You loved with your spirit, your eyes and your will to live. You made the most of every day. You didn't take one breath for granted. You gave us the chance to hold you in our arms until you were ready to leave. I am so thankful we got to hold you in our arms and tell you how much we loved you all day. You let me hold you until you took your last breath and let you mom hold you until your last heart beat. Thank you Hogan. Thank you God. We love you so much.

I am still amazed at how many people have been touched by your life Hogan. I have been on facebook for 3 years asking people to be my friend and a few hundred were nice enough to accept my invite. I put a couple of random messages on this blog to "friend" me to follow your journey more often and I had more than 1500 new friends in a matter of days. Hogan, you are a hero. God used you for good. I am sure He is continuing to use you!

I am so thankful that your mom is so strong. Did you notice how she held you close and cried out to you while you were saying goodbye? She was asking if you were seeing angels. She loved you like only a mother can love a child. She took over most of the "nurse" duties in the NICU for you over the last few days. She is an incredible mother and an amazing wife. I am so blessed.

Hogan, you have no idea how much Lily and Noah wanted you to come home to see them. I think they were a little upset when some people came to take away your isolette and accessories from our house. Noah said "that's Hogan's bed" when they were rolling it away. You will have to tell Jesus to help me explain your mission to him!! Lily loves you too! I think she was making sure there was nothing to eat around your isolette! She likes to eat like I do... she is a cutie!

I was so happy that your Grandparents and your Great Grandmother Granny Blanche got to see you and get kisses before you went to be with Jesus. I am so thankful that my mother, your "grandma Hogan" got to enjoy your life too. I believe that God used your "grandma Hogan" over my life to prepare me for a major storm like this one. Although God didn't always calm the storms that she encountered in her life, He always calmed her and gave her peace and strength. I also know that it was Angie's grandparents and mother and father that God used to give her the foundation to stand firm in the middle of this storm. We are so thankful for our families.

Your friends have become family to us! I read your messages on your blog and my facebook page and I see so many people mention how although they have never met you they feel like they know you. I think the feeling is mutual. Although we haven't met your friends "face to face" in person. I feel like I know them. We are all brothers and sisters in Christ. I believe that is where the connection has surfaced. We have all prayed together. We have all laughed together and celebrated the good times and we have all cried together and felt pain together in the bad times. We all know that just because we are believers that it doesn't mean we don't hurt or go through tough times. Sometimes God uses these tough times to make us better and we can learn so much from them. I feel like God has taught me so much by being with you over the past two weeks. He has used your life to connect Christians in Denmark, England, Canada, Germany, Australia, Africa and in most every state here in the United States. I am overwhelmed by how big God really is. I am also thankful that we will soon celebrate and honor your life with your friends. We are going to celebrate your life with a funeral service on Wednesday at 11AM at Prince Avenue Baptist Church with a short graveside at Oconee Hill behind Sanford Stadium in Athens. Your mother and I have asked Lord and Stephens to have a visitation on Tuesday night in Oconee County for any of your friends to come say hello to us. You mother and I already had decided before your birth no matter if you lived 1 second, 1 week, 1 year or whatever that we would do this for you. Like I told you in a few blogs over the months. You are no better or no worse than any other person on this earth. I do believe your time management skills were a little above the norm though :-).

Hogan, it has been a long journey. Your journey took a turn on April 2nd when you entered this world and it took a turn early this morning when you left it. It is amazing the feeling of the secret chamber in your heart that opens when you have a child. You can't explain it. It's just a feeling that you didn't know you could love someone that much or like "that". Then when child number 2 comes along... another chamber opens that you didn't know exists. You never thought you could love your second child like your first. When number 3 comes along that next hidden chamber opens... it feels so amazing. These hidden chambers are hard to explain because they are so big but yet so tender. There is so much love there but yet it doesn't take much to hurt those hidden chambers. I now know what it feels like when one of those chambers suddenly vanishes. There is a hole there that is worse than any other feeling in this world. I tried to get ready for it and plan for it mentally but I couldn't. As good as that chamber suddenly opens when a new child enters this world it is more painful on the opposite end when the child leaves. I know that God will get us through this time. I am not doubting God and I know that God wouldn't allow more than I can handle. I am going to focus on our "point", Hogan!!

Your mom and I read in books about Trisomy 18 and asked many physicians about this condition over the past few months. There was very little hope for a "wimpy white male baby" (all white male babies get tagged this).. to make it to birth with this condition. I think every person knows now that you are not the "normal" wimpy white male baby!! You were God's baby Warrior! You were on a mission to get here and when you got here you were on a mission. God used you so much in your days on this earth. It was an honor to be beside you on your journey here on this earth. You are now in Heaven and I believe that you are still on a mission. I believe that your story will live on. I pray that God will continue to use your love and your passion to live. You made an impact in this world Hogan!! You put a different face on Heaven for me. It was a place that I wanted to be before you were born. Now, its a place that I have got to be. I can't wait to see you again.

I miss my little warrior with the huge heart.

I love you.

Hogan Sayer Dominy

2010-04-18T07:48:00.007-04:00

Hogan Sayer Dominy

4/2/2010 - 4/18/2010

http://www.teresavickery.com/hogandominy.mov

Dear Friends,

Hogan fought an amazing fight for the past two weeks. He honored God with every breath he took and changed our lives forever. He passed away early this morning in our arms. Our hearts are heavy with love for him. We will continue to focus on the point and thank God for allowing us this special time. He was and is a miracle. Thank you all for loving on us and him. Hogan was God's little warrior with a huge heart. He has no problems now. He has a new body. We would love your continued prayers. We love all of you for joining Hogan on his journey. I could tell how bright his eyes got when I would tell him about the messages that were sent to him. Thank God for his little life and the impact that he made on this world.

In His Love,

Kip

Hogan, you are an amazing warrior!

2010-04-17T23:10:00.004-04:00

Hogan Sayer Dominy

...we are perplexed, but we don't give up and quit...we get knocked down but we get back up and keep going. Through suffering, these bodies of ours constantly share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies. Yes, we live under constant danger of death because we serve Jesus, so that the life of Jesus will be obvious in our dying bodies. So we live in the face of death but it has resulted in eternal life for you. II Corinthians 4:8-12

Dear Hogan,

I am enjoying being with you again tonight in the NICU. I know it's a little different because your mom and I have been holding you all day. We even let your dog, "dog" out to hang out with us today. I am pretty sure that you have liked being in our arms because you have thought about leaving this world a few times but you keep coming back.

Hogan, you are such a blessing to so many people. You are an amazing little warrior that has fought to be with us and accomplish your purpose here on this earth. We are so thankful that God has given us this time to be with you. Your mom mentioned earlier to me today that she wished so badly that she could have held you in her arms like she did with Noah and Lily. Guess what!? You are letting her hold you like that tonight. She is letting you lay on her chest while she sleeps. I am so proud of you Hogan. You dropped your stats all day long and always came fighting back again and again. I think that you might be up to your tricks again. Nurse Lisa was running back and forth all day for you. I know you love her! You get to play tricks again with Nurse Laura tonight! Also, your grandparents, aunts and uncles were called to come to the hospital at noon because it didn't look like you would be here much longer. They stayed with us all afternoon and watched you almost leave a few times and have now all gone home to rest. I was glad they all got to kiss you and tell you how much you were loved by them.

I don't want you to be afraid Hogan. Once you leave this earth, your little body will not have all of those accessories that you have now. I know, I know, you like them and you think that is normal. It's not normal buddy! You will have a perfect body one day! Once you leave this earth you will go and be with Jesus in Heaven. It will be a happy time for you. I am sure you will have many buddies there!

I wanted you to know that people are being so good to us. They are sending messages, prayers and love your way Hogan! I hope you heard me this afternoon when I was telling you about all of those amazing people that love you.

We have hugged and kissed on you all day long. I know you are tired from fighting. I know you are probably tired of us telling you how much we love you! I want you to rest tonight buddy. I know you are probably worried about the people that you might leave behind if you choose to go be with Jesus but I want you to know that I am so proud of you. I want you to be here tomorrow night for me but I want what is best for you Hogan. Your mother and I will miss you more than you will ever know if you decide to leave but we will see you soon when we meet again in Heaven. You have done so much in your 15 days, soon to be 16 days! God is so mighty. You have let God use your little body to do more good than I thought was ever possible. Hogan, you are my hero. I love you with all of my heart.

I will write you another letter tomorrow night but right now I am about snuggle up beside you and your mom. I am so thankful for you.

I love you.

"baby Hogan"

2010-04-16T23:50:00.000-04:00

Teresa Vickery - Incredible Nurse, Incredible Photographer, and NILMDTS angel!

14 Day Birthday!!!

Noah loves his baby brother Hogan.

Handle with Care!

Thank you for all of the Auburn prayers.... thanks Wynne, Hogan loves the blanket!

For the Lord is good. His unfailing love continues forever, and his faithfulness continues to each generation. Psalm 100:5 NLT

Let them all praise the name of the Lord, for his name is very great; his glory towers over the earth and heaven! Psalm 148:13 NLT

Dear Hogan,

I am so glad that you are here. Happy 2 week birthday!!! I hope you liked all of the balloons that were flying above your isolette this morning when you woke up. Your mom and I enjoyed getting to share that moment with you.

I am sorry that those old heart problems started acting up again early this morning. I know your medicine made you a little sleepy but we wanted you to relax. You have been fighting so hard it was evident you needed some rest. Hogan, you are a true warrior. Thank you for letting us hold you so much today. I hope you enjoyed being out of your isolette more than normal. Did you see Noah's eyes when he saw you this morning!? Wow, Noah was so happy to see you. I am so thankful that Noah loves you so much. Did you like the blue race car that he brought you? I saw that he had a package with 2 race cars in it when he came into your room. It made me so proud when he told me that one of the cars was for "baby Hogan". He wanted you to have the blue car and Noah kept the red race car. That is the cool automobile that your "dog" has been checking out all day. I am starting to think that "dog" is wondering if you are going to take that race car and get out of this place sometime soon!!?!

Hogan, if you don't have a problem with it... then I think I am going to let your mom hang out with us tonight and join our "guys night" in the NICU. I know, I know.... no more peanuts, popcorn and making the alarms go off so that we can see which nurse is the fastest to get here. You did give "dog" your stop watch right?? Remember when you kept doing flips in Dr. Rosemond's office during your appointment? I wish you could have watched Ms. Candace's face when Dr. Rosemond sat down to check you out and you had flipped. You are quite the prankster! I have noticed that you have trouble picking out your favorite nurse to pick on every day and night. They are all fun and they all love you so much. I guess we will let your mom into our little "guys piece of Heaven on earth" in the NICU tonight.

Thank you for two wonderful weeks Hogan. We have laughed and cried together. I will never forget our times together and we will never lose the friendships we have made. Do you think you can go for three weeks!?!? How about we just focus on our point and see what happens? I am starting to even think like you Hogan! You are such a good influence on me. Thank you for being here another night. Let's take one minute/hour/day at a time. I look forward to writing another letter tomorrow night. I am going to put this computer down tonight and hold you for a while and tell you all of the things that people are saying about you. I am going to pray with you. I am going to let you know how many children just a few years older than you are loving you and praying for you every day. I am going to tell you about grandparents and parents and teenagers that are praying for you. I am going to tell you about all of different states and countries have people praying for you. God isn't in a box Hogan. God is amazing. He allowed a baby named Hogan who only weighs 3 pounds to come into this world and be an amazing disciple. Let's thank God for the journey that we have been on and for the people that we have met and brought along with us. Hogan, your journey is not over. Let's make some more memories!

I love you.

Hogan, the warrior with the big Heart!

2010-04-16T17:20:00.010-04:00

Angie and I have really enjoyed holding Hogan today.

Nurse Lisa loves Hogan and Hogan loves Nurse Lisa!

Big Brother Noah stopped by to say hello to Hogan!

Noah wanted to kiss Hogan, tell him that he loved him and he gave him a blue race car!!!

Happy 2 week Birthday Hogan!!

Hogan, my hero

http://www.teresavickery.com/hogandominy.mov

Dear Friends,

I wanted you all to know that Hogan is having a really tough time. He is in no pain and has an amazing peaceful look about him that only God can give. He is alive and in no pain right now. I have eluded to his heart being big so many times in my past blogs and it looks like the little man just has too big of a heart. I know you can tell by the way he has lived his life and has loved so many. His eyes have been so peaceful since day 1.

We are enjoying today just like the other days with him. We have thrown the isolette out as the official "holder" today and have been soaking up ever moment that we have been able! We are so blessed with so many friends and followers of Hogan and we appreciate you being on this journey with him. The journey has been a long one but has been filled with blessings that I can't count. We have Romans 8:28 on Hogan's white board here in the NICU at St. Mary's today and it is so true. Although it rips my heart out to see my son like this, it is also a blessing to have been able to be with him on this journey and to be able to be with him today. I wish I could trade places with him. I don't understand some things but am trusting God and focusing on the "point' which is Him. I pray that we do this every day. Hogan is alive today and I don't want to give up hope but I want what is best for Hogan and not me. My hope and prayer that we would have a live birth was a miracle. Every day of life is a miracle. The human body is a miracle. God has taught me so much by using this little warrior! He has fought and won many battles. He has brought Glory to God's kingdom. He has changed our family for the better forever. He has made so many people proud and gave so many people inspiration. I am so thankful to God for him. Angie and I aren't leaving his side for the rest of this journey.

Angie is holding Hogan right now and I have to get back to my time with him!!!! I have many more kisses to give him tonight. I will look forward to writing the little guy a letter later tonight! God Bless all of you and thank you for your prayers!! I wanted to send this "update" out to you so that you would know what was going on with Hogan today. I can't tell you how thankful we are for the love and support that you have given us. I have gotten so many notes from you which has been so uplifting. I will try and update this blog later tonight. I hope you all have a great weekend and enjoy God's greatest gift... life... here on earth and then with him for eternity! That is the greatest gift. Hogan may live another 50 years or he may live another 5 minutes or 1 day. We all have this prognosis! If there is one thing I have learned from God through Hogan is to live every day like its your last and fight every battle with a focus on your "point" Jesus Christ!

We love you all.

Kip, Angie, Noah, Lily Rose and Hogan (God's little warrior!)

A little Miracle from God...

2010-04-16T01:40:00.000-04:00

Hogan Sayer Dominy

Hogan loves his Mom!

My hero!

"For I know the plans I have for you," Says the Lord." They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope In those days when you pray, I will listen. "If you look for me in earnest, you will find me. Jeremiah 29:11-13

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. Romans 8:28

Have you never heard or understood? Don't you know that the Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of all the earth? He never grows faint or weary. No one can measure the depths of his understanding. He gives power to those who are tired and worn out; he offers strength to the weak. Even youths will become exhausted, and young men will give up. But those who wait on the Lord will find new strength. They will fly high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint. Isaiah 40:28-31

Dr. Hogan,

I am so happy to be sitting here with you only a few hours before we will celebrate your 2 week birthday! I know you have had a roller coaster ride over the past couple of weeks but we are so glad that you keep fighting to live. God continues to use your little body in such a miraculous way. I am so proud of you. I tell your brother, sister and your mom how proud of them I am too. God has blessed me so much. I am so thankful.

I am so happy that you had such a good morning and afternoon today! I know things got a little crazy for you tonight and you got to take some new medicine to calm your heart problems but I am so thankful that your body seems to be tolerating the medicine and it seems to be working. I was so happy that I got to hold you late tonight too! Your mom went home tonight to be with Noah and Lily but she has been checking on your very often. She is such an amazing woman. I know you are so proud of her.

I almost forgot to let you know that Ms. Teresa sent us your "coming into our world" video today!!!! I wanted to share it with you and all of your blog followers! Click on the link below:

http://www.teresavickery.com/hogandominy.mov

You are a special baby.

It is late as I type this letter to you and I am not sure I know just what to say to you tonight. I have been praying so hard for you and I have also been busy thanking God for you and your friends. Hogan, you have some incredible friends that follow your blog and that have become my friend on facebook so that they can follow your story. God has gifted you with an amazing strength. It makes me feel good to hear the nurses talk about how impressed that they are with the strength that you have shown on your journey. Thanks for being so tough. Thank you for showing me how to love. Thanks for showing me how to show compassion. Thank you for showing me how to enjoy the simple things in life! The only thing you are looking for in life is a little oxygen to breathe and for someone to love on you. Thank you God for using Hogan to make me a better man. Hogan, thank you for being so easy to love.

I love you.

The Heart of a Warrior

2010-04-14T23:58:00.000-04:00

"How precious are your thoughts about me, O God! They are innumerable! I can't even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake in the morning you are still with me." Psalms 139:17,18

Dear Hogan,

You continue to amaze me. I am so thankful that you are here. We are celebrating our 13th guys night out in the NICU together and they just keep getting better! Hogan, you are a warrior. You are my hero. I am so thankful that you have fought so hard and won so many battles. I continue to thank God for being able to be with you on your journey. I am thankful that I am able to watch God use you to grow families closer like you have done to ours. I am so thankful. I praise God that you are being used and that people have told me that their lives have been changed forever because of you Hogan. I know it is hard for you to think about or understand things like this because you are just hoping to make it to the next minute, hour or day.

I wanted to let you know I had a person who I don't know ask me today how many more days the doctors were giving you to live. I thought to myself, don't we all wish we knew the answer to that question?! It is the same question I asked Dr. V after you were born. He told us that you would live 5 to 7 days at best and that his life would probably end sooner. He gave this judgement on his observation of your work of breathing and his weight and his lung and heart size. We can change the number of days that you are alive on our board every day but we can't put the end date on the board yet. We don't know when the last number will go up on your board. We don't know the last number on anyones board though Hogan. Nobody knows when their last breath will be taken. We do know that everyone will take a last breath though. It is important to understand that what is important is how you honor God with the days you are given in this life.

Hogan, please keep fighting to live. We were told we probably wouldn't have a live birth. We were told that most people terminate T18 babies. We were told that T18 babies weren't compatible with life. I am so thankful that we are able to spend this precious time together. We couldn't dream of missing out on the miracle of you. We are so proud of you!

I can't believe that your day was so crazy. Did you know that we set another record here at St. Mary's today? I guess it wasn't me.... it was you and your mom! Your mom got up to the NICU to see you an hour after having gave birth to you by c-section. We were told that the fastest that any mother made it up here after a c-section birth was at best 3 hours but probably more like 4! Your mom holds a record here Hogan! Aren't you proud of her? She wanted to see you so much! Today was your day to set some more records. I had left to run home to get your big brother and take him to preschool for his class pictures this morning while your mom hung out with you. Well, I hadn't even gotten Noah to preschool when your mom called me to let me know you were having heart issues and asked me when I could get back to the hospital. Nurse Lisa thought that I might want to come back here just in case. We were told that you were having "PVC's". These "PVC's" aren't a big deal to a normal person or a normal baby if they happen periodically. The problem was that you were having them constant and after every heart contraction. Your heart is already compromised so the extra stress isn't good.

Dr. Morales and Dr. "V" wanted to get blood work and also monitor you for a little while to determine what step to take next. I was able to get your brother to his school to take pictures and get back to the hospital just in time to see Dr. Morales and get the report with you mother. He told us that they had decided to cut back down the volume of food you were getting to see if that would help you. Your heart would start having these "PVC's" periodically on and off all morning and early afternoon. Your work of breathing wasn't good either. The good thing is that late this afternoon you started to get better. Your heart stopped having the irregularities and you actually started breathing a little better then you were earlier. Your mother and I are so thankful that you have improved. We understand that this problem could come back tonight and that your breathing could get worse at any minute but right now you are stable.

I also wanted to let you know that Noah and Lily are so proud of you. Noah asked your grandmother to tell you that he loved you the other night. That was really neat to hear but when your grandmother told me that the first thing that Noah asked her when she returned home was if she had told you that he loved you. You make our family better Hogan. You make me a better person.

Your mother and I are praying that you have a good night tonight. I also don't want you to think that we are the only people praying for you Hogan. You have an army of prayer warriors. The army keeps growing every day. God is using your fight to live and your life story to change lives Hogan. I know I have told you how much you have changed our family but you are changing other families. I get messages all day long from people that have been impacted by your 3 pound body. It warms my heart to read messages of children that are praying for you and asking about your health. They love you Hogan. You are a hero to many. You are a warrior for God's kingdom. I know you have got to be tired. I know you have got to be exhausted. I can't thank you enough for continuing your journey. You have been on a mission since you started this journey and I pray that your journey continues. You are special Hogan.

I love you.

Hogan's Heart

2010-04-14T12:31:00.002-04:00

Just a quick update. Hogan started having PVC's this morning. This normally isn't a big issue for people but the problem is that they were happening after every normal contraction of the heart. Hogan already has heart problems and being so small this isn't a good thing. The PVC's aren't happening as bad at the moment and we hope they stay away! The Dr's did more blood work which were "ok". They have now decided to cut back on his volume of feeding amounts. They hope this will help. He is currently better for the moment. I will update later if anything changes. Just pray that the PVC's go away!! He is breathing is a little tougher today but not as bad as it was after birth. Again, for those of you that want "quicker" prayer requests or updates please "friend" me at "Kip Dominy" on Facebook. My facebook page has turned into Hogan's page! God Bless you and thank you for your prayers and love for Hogan.

Hogan is on a mission! Thank God!

2010-04-13T23:51:00.000-04:00

Hogan and his new blanket!

Hogan was so tired tonight.

Hogan was very alert today during lunch!

Consider it all joy, my brothers ans sisters, when you encounter various trials of every sort, knowing the testing of your faith produces endurance, steadfastness, and growth. James 1:2,3 NLT

Dear Hogan,

I am so thankful that we get to hang out in the NICU again another night. Can you believe that this is our 12th night here?! I am so thankful that we can hang out together another night. I appreciate your fighting to live another day. I am so happy that you are here! I know you like to attack every day like it is your last and that you glance at the long term but focus on the short term. Keep fighting buddy. I might have a surprise for you soon!

I am so glad that you had such a peaceful day. You were pretty sharp in your mothers arms at lunch. I haven't seen you so alert in a while! I can easily see that your stats are always best when you are in our arms... especially in your mom's! I pray that we get to hold you again in the morning. Isn't it amazing that when you have a good day after a bad day that it feels even better than normal? You are experiencing the same thing that your mom and I and many others experience.

Sometimes it takes going through tough times in life to appreciate the good times. It never means that God is with you in the good times and leaves you in the bad times. Hogan, God is always with you. He is with you in every moment of every day. Please never forget that God has you in the palm of his hand at all times. I know you see your mother and I outside of your isolette when you don't feel good and it's hard to breathe. I am sure that you have trouble breathing sometimes and you can't see us. Always know that we love you even if you can't see us sometimes. Thank you for being you Hogan. Thank God that he loves us unconditionally. It doesn't matter that your not "normal". I actually think that the ladies think you are cute. I have heard them talking when I am out and about around the hospital. :-) I also wanted to let you know I have put pictures of you on the internet. The pictures are on your blog and on my facebook page. I know, you have no idea what I am trying to tell you but just know that so many people that think you are a good looking little man! I love you Hogan Dominy!

Did you hear Dr. Morales talking to us this morning? Dr. Morales didn't have much to say today. He told us that you were stable. He told us that we wouldn't change anything at the moment. I can tell you like Dr. Morales. He tells us what he sees and what we can probably expect to see in the future but he does so with and enormous amount of compassion. He is such a blessing. We do have to keep changing your oxygen flow periodically but that isn't a major thing. I am so thankful that the nurses are so quick in getting to you to bring you back if you start forgetting to breathe or if you need a little help in the oxygen department! I still haven't quite figured out if you are playing with your "stats" and you just like to see them come back here and care for you or if you are really in trouble. You are pretty crafty little guy! I know how you like to play games with those that love you. I love how you enjoy life and laugh knowing every minute could be your last! I am thankful that God has used you to remind me of that Hogan. I can see you fighting through the tough times and enjoying the good times.

I wanted to let you know that since I told everyone that followed your blog to "friend" me on facebook that I have gotten to be friends with hundreds and hundreds of people because of you. I have been on this earth for almost 39 years and have been on facebook for a few years and in 3 days you have many, many, many more friends than me. I think that is awesome. I am so happy that God is using your little life. I know that we are your parents but I feel like all of these people are family now. They love you so much. I get messages all day long from all over the nation and all over the globe from people that I don't even know that are praying for you. It is amazing that God has brought us all together for good and to glorify God. Hogan, you have a purpose here. Everyone is put on this earth with a purpose and can make a difference. You are only 3 lbs., you have very small lungs, you have an enlarged heart, you only have one ear and God is using you. There are people that have perfect bodies and perfect hearts that don't live to glorify God like you. You have convicted me to be my best and to honor God along the way. I am so proud of you. I am so thankful that you are who you are Hogan. I love every thing about you. I love the fact that you can bring people together for good in the name of Jesus. This world has a lot of bad in it but you are a very bright light in a world of darkness. God has used your life to give me hope.

I am not a political activist by any means but way back in November when we found out you had this condition called Trisomy 18. We read and heard that you were incompatible with life. You mom and I chose to carry you to birth praying that we would get the chance to hold you and kiss your face before you went to be with Jesus. I think you are full of life Hogan. I am so glad that God has used you to change our family over the past few months. We are better because of you. I am so glad that we are so blessed to spend these days with you. I know many people don't get this chance. God is all over your life. I am so glad that you are here and I am so glad that your prayer warriors have joined together to pray for you and to grow closer to our Heavenly Father. I am proud of you Hogan. I am proud of Noah, Lily and your mother. God has truly blessed me.

Keep fighting to live little guy. Thank you being a warrior. I pray that we have our "guys night out" again tomorrow night!

I love you.

It's a good day so far!

2010-04-13T13:14:00.003-04:00

God Bless all of you for your continued prayers. Hogan is having a good day today. He slept most of yesterday and this morning but was awake for a while during lunch today. Dr. Morales came by Hogan's room for his daily visit and was pleased with his observation. We are still minute to minute and hour to hour but.... isn't everyone?!! :) We thank God that Hogan is still here with us and that God is using the little warrior with the big heart!

I also wanted to remind some of you prayers warriors to please "Friend" me on Facebook at "Kip Dominy"... I have Hogan's picture as my profile picture. I appreciate those of you that have already done this! I will give quicker updates and prayer requests for specific needs on FB. I look forward to writing my letter tonight to Hogan. I hope you all understand! Again, thank you for loving Hogan and for being on this journey with us. We are very thankful for you.

Have a great day!

In His Love,

Kip

Hogan's heroes

2010-04-12T19:26:00.017-04:00

Angie and Hogan

Angie getting Hogan from Nurse Laura tonight for our 9pm holding time!

Handle with care!!

..."My gracious favor is all you need. My power works best in your weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may work through me. II Corinthians 12:9 NLT

Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Philippians 4:6 NLT

Dear Hogan,

You are something special little guy! I can't believe how much you have slept over the past day and a half but you need to rest after your rough weekend. I am so thankful that we get to have another "guys night out" in the NICU tonight. Can you believe we will be celebrating your 11th day birthday in the morning!? Your mother and I thank God every day for allowing us to spend this time with you. We had prayed for 5 months for a live birth and now are overwhelmed with the blessing of your life.

Did you hear Dr. Morales talking about you today? He was telling your mom and I that you were going to have good days and bad days. I know the bad days scare you because they bother me too. Remember what we have always talked about though Hogan.... take every minute/hour/day at a time. Don't miss today by thinking about tomorrow. You have taught me these things Hogan. God has used your 3 pound body to teach me to trust in him and to not worry so much about the little things in life. You are teaching me so much. Remember last week when we thought today would be the day we could take you home from St. Mary's? We even got some of your equipment set up for you. Obviously, that didn't happen because of the tough time you had over the weekend. It will happen in God's timing though Hogan. We might have been forcing something that we wanted before it was supposed to happen. I know it doesn't make much sense to you because you are just trying to enjoy every breath but sometimes God doesn't always give us what we want when we want it. He may never give us what we think we should be able to have. I know it's a little confusing but just know that even though we didn't get take you home with us today doesn't mean that God doesn't love you. Just trust in Him! Let's focus on him and I will assure you we will make it through any storm together! We are just happy that you are still here. Like your brother Noah told me tonight when I went home to check on him. He was just glad I was there. Hogan, I am glad you are here.

We are thankful that you look better tonight than you did last night. Although you aren't breathing great, I can tell you are breathing better than last night. I pray it continues through the night for you buddy. I could tell you were tired and didn't feel good last night. You needed your rest. We are hoping for good results from your culture that was taken on Sunday morning. Thanks for continuing to fight Hogan. You are a true warrior. You are God's little warrior with the big heart!

I also wanted you to know that the reason your mom and I both slept in your room last night was because we were concerned about you. Do you remember having such a hard time breathing last night? It broke our hearts to watch you work so hard to catch your breath. We were so happy when we got up this morning and you were not having to work as hard to breathe. We thank God for giving you rest.

Hogan, can you believe that more and more people are praying for you?! I can tell that God is using your little body and it warms my heart. It is an awesome feeling to watch God work. I have gotten so much encouragement from the messages being sent to you. Hogan, you have young and old people praying for you. I told everyone that was reading your blog and praying for you to "friend" me on this thing called Facebook and now even more people are praying for you and I think you are finding strength through your prayer warriors. I think we should call them your heros! I think that everyone that loves you and prays for you is a hero to me and your mother. I know you feel the same way because I can see it in your eyes!

Hogan, I have no idea why God has blessed us with the blessing of being your parents. We don't deserve it but we are very thankful. You are the most amazing baby. Thank you for being you. I love your unique characterstics. I am so proud of you Hogan. Keep fighting!!

I love you.

You will keep in perfect peace all who trust in you, whose thoughts are fixed on you! Isaiah 26:3 NLT

Quick update - Monday, April 12th

2010-04-12T14:33:00.004-04:00

Good Morning Hogan!

HOGAN DOMINY

We had a good visit with Dr. Morales today. Hogan's fever has come back down and the initial blood work looks good. Hogan isn't struggling to breathe nearly as much today as he was last night! We will get the results from his culture tomorrow. We continue to be thankful that Hogan fights through these battles. Thanks to those of you who have "friended" me through Facebook. It is easier to give quick updates on Facebook. I hope everyone has a great week. Thank you so much for the encouragement and prayers that have been sent. We can't thank you enough.

Hogan is very tired tonight.....

2010-04-11T23:21:00.001-04:00

Hogan "God's Warrior"

Now glory be to God! By his mighty power at work within us. he is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope. May he be given glory in the church and in Christ Jesus forever and ever through endless ages. Amen. Ephesians 3:20 NLT

Dear Hogan,

I am glad that you are sleeping tonight. You have had a rough weekend and hopefully you are resting up after fighting more battles today. I am sorry that you have had to battle so hard just to stay alive but I am thankful that you are still with us. I am really going to enjoy tonight with you in the NICU. I might just sit here and pray for you and for all of the people that have been so good to us through your journey. I am so happy that you are here.

Your night didn't get much better than your afternoon did yesterday and after waking up in the middle of the night with a fever of 101 the decision was made to take blood work from you to determine if you have an infection. The initial blood work results were elevated but not much. I am interested to see what the blood work shows tomorrow morning. We will also get your blood culture results back on Tuesday morning. I know you feel like going to battle everyday is just part of your world but it would be nice for you to be able to rest a little. God gave us a day of rest and I am glad that you are taking advantage of it this afternoon.

I also know you were wondering what that big "mobile crane" :-) coming into your room was this morning shortly after your breakfast. That was your x-ray machine. Dr. Morales wanted to take a picture of your chest to see if you might have pneumonia. I am very thankful that the x-ray results were negative for this! Dr. Morales did notice something else from your x-ray. He noticed that your heart is getting bigger. I know we have laughed together about your "large heart" but this is serious Hogan. Your little heart is having to work so hard that your heart muscle is growing. This sounds like it would be a good thing but it's not. Your heart is working too hard because its enlarged. I know it is hard for you to understand because you think that the more you love the people the bigger your heart gets. Well, this isn't quite the same thing Hogan. You have a big heart in more ways than just in the physical term. You have a huge heart by the way you fight to live. You have fought to beat the odds. You have loved everyone that has viewed your pictures or met you face to face. Hogan, you are my hero and you will always be my hero. You have changed my life and I pray that God will continue to give you strength so that you can change many others.

I loved being able to hold you on my chest without my shirt on this afternoon. I don't know who slept more!? Me or you!?!? I did this with your older brother when he was a baby and I wanted to do it with you too. I loved to feel your little heart beat on my chest. Thank you Hogan for letting me take a nap with you. I thank God for this afternoon. I will never forget the feeling of your little body on me.

Hogan, I can't even begin to tell you how many people are praying for you and sending words of encouragement to your mom and me. They are even following your updates on my facebook page now. I let people know on your blog this afternoon that I can give updates about you quicker and easier through facebook and all they have to do is ask me to be their friend. If they are reading your blog then they are for sure a friend of ours, right Hogan!? I love you buddy. They talk about how tough you are and how you inspire them. They tell me how good looking you are and that your "accessories" that you have to wear make you look even cuter. Although you only have one ear I know you hear me loud and clear when I tell you I love you. I know you hear me when I tell you that people are praying for you buddy. Get some rest tonight Hogan and maybe tomorrow night you will be ready to play games again. Everyone that has come into contact with you loves you Hogan. God has his hands on you and is using you Hogan. I am so glad that God chose me to be your father. I am going to be right here with you tonight if you need me. I pray that you have a good nights sleep and that you feel better in the morning.

I love you Hogan.

quick update - Sunday, April 11th

2010-04-11T11:50:00.000-04:00

Hogan has had a rough 24 hours.

Hogan is back where he feels the best!

I could kiss Hogan's little head 1 million times a day!

Hogan is tired from his recent battles.

Hogan has had a very rough 24 hours. We almost lost him yesterday afternoon and were reminded how quickly life can be taken. We are thankful that he is still fighting his battle to stay alive again this morning. He did have to go back on the vapotherm oxygen machine last night. He wasn't able to sustain using the different machine that we would be using at our house. He also had blood work taken this morning because he had a fever of 101 during the early morning hours. Dr. Morales also ordered an X-ray to see if he had pneumonia. Thank God the X-ray showed that there was no pneumonia. We will see how his blood work looks this afternoon to see if antibiotics are needed to be given to Hogan. The feeding tube is now back in his mouth where it was after he was born and he has gotten his IV back. The feeding tube was moved to his nose from his mouth a day or two after he was born but because he had the problems yesterday and the swelling and congestion in his nostrils, the nurses had to move the tube back to allow for oxygen to pass through. Thank you for your continued prayers.

I also wanted anyone that has followed this blog to know that I do give updates periodically on my facebook page for those of you that might have a facebook account. It has been a blessing to be able to give quick posts and more pictures. So, if you want to follow him a little more than the letters on the blog, I will gladly be your "friend" on facebook! Just look for "Kip Dominy" and a picture of Hogan!

Have a very blessed Sunday afternoon. Thank you all for being so good to our family. We can't tell you how much we appreciate it. I also don't have the time right now to comment to each of your blog comments but your messages are being read over and over. They help give me strength. Thank you for your messages. God Bless you!

Kip

Hang in there Hogan!

2010-04-10T23:59:00.001-04:00

Thank you God for moments like this one.

Hogan Sayer Dominy

Oh Lord, I will honor and praise your name, for you are my God. You do such wonderful things! You planned them long ago, and now you have accomplished them. Isaiah 25:1 NLT

I know the Lord is always with me. I will not be shaken, for he is right beside me. Psalm 16:8 NLT

Dear Hogan,

I am so glad that you are here tonight.

I am so glad that we made it through another day and we are having our "guys night out" in your room in the NICU! I think I am enjoying tonight as much as I did the first night you were here.

Hogan, you are my hero.

You have battled many battles over the past week. You have battled harder than anyone thought you would or could. Keep up the good work Hogan. Your journey is far from over. I think God has bigger plans for you. Your story is far from over little warrior. I can see some signs of exhaustion on your face but I also see so many signs of strength!

Your mother and I went home after lunch to see your brother and sister for a couple of hours today. Noah and Lily were asking about you! I think your mom really enjoyed seeing them. I brought your mom back to the hospital to hold you at 3 this afternoon. She was so excited to get back to see you! I went to watch a few minutes of the G Day game. It was nice to go outside and watch a little football on a great day but my heart and mind couldn't help but think about you. You are always on my heart. You are always in my mind Hogan. I walked around wearing my "baby wrist band" from St. Mary's. I couldn't be more proud of you.

As I walked around that stadium, I wondered how many people I passed along the way were going through trials in their life. I know not many people have to battle Trisomy 18 but there are lots of things that can change a life that doesn't have to be fatal. Hogan, let's pray for those people tonight. Let's pray that wherever they are and whatever they are having a battle against, that they would find the point that you are focusing. That they would look to their Savior. It might be a relationship problem, it might be a work problem, it might be guilt problem... who knows! Let's just lift those people up tonight. There might be someone that reads your blog and your story changes their life. Hogan, you and I both know that all of our days on this earth are numbered. The good thing about that is if someone if reading this blog tonight and they feel like they want to give up because of mistakes they have made or whatever, they have time to change! Their own journey isn't over yet. Hogan, your journey isn't over either. Let's keep praying for others just like they have been praying for us and focusing on our point. God is so good. I think that I love you unconditionally but I know that their is only one that can do this. It's your real Father in Heaven. Thank you God for letting me be with Hogan tonight to pray! Thank you for using his life to change lives. Thank you for using others to change our lives.

Ok.... getting back to today....

When I got back to the hospital this afternoon I was told that you had a major fight on your hands while I was not here. Your nasal passage ways are so small that it doesn't take much to cause you trouble breathing. This isn't a good thing with someone will small lungs like you and especially when your nasal passage gets stopped up. Nurse Louise went to work on your to try and bring you back and get you stable. She had to work with you to get your back going again and had to put your feeding tube back into your other nostril. Thank God that she worked quickly and was able to help save you. This evening you started having the same thing happen. You were starting to have more trouble while you were feeding so Nurse Laura went ahead and put your feeding tube back in your mouth and also talked to Dr. Morales about the situation. They decided that you should go back on the vapotherm machine. I am glad that everything got done quickly and that you are now stable again tonight. I am praying that your air passage way gets better and that your heart wasn't too stressed from today's problems. You have had a tough time of it today but I am so happy you continue to fight.

Hogan, I hope you know that even when your mother and I aren't sitting in front of you or holding you that we are still with you in our minds and in our hearts. I also want you to know that if for some reason that we didn't ever show up in front of you that Jesus is always going to be with you. I don't want to scare you little guy but I want you to know that we all have a beginning and an end in this world. I hope that we all live a long and happy life together but nothing is certain. We never know when our next breath could be our last. I don't want you to ever think that you are alone Hogan. God is always going to be with you. He will never leave you. He loves you Hogan.

I hear your episode was so quick that I don't know if we could have saved you if we would have been at home with you. Hogan we are praying for a peace about taking you home with us. Although the equipment has been delivered. It doesn't mean that we are going to rush you home and not feel comfortable about being able to look after you. We won't take you home unless we feel confident that we are ready and have a peace about it. We all want you there but we also want to make wise decisions. Let's keep praying about that decision too!

I think you have proven that you are not a "wimpy white male" like most white boy babies are tagged. You are a true warrior that God has given enormous strength and resolve. I didn't think that I could learn any more from you but I keep learning. I look at you and I see peace. It would be so easy to blame someone for your problems. It would be easy to quit because nobody expected you to still be alive. I think you are on a mission. I am praying that God will continue to work through your 3 pound body!

Every night your mother and I go downstairs to get a something to drink on the third floor before heading back up to the NICU. Every night we usually see "healthy" babies downstairs in the window. I am so happy for those parents that have those babies. I watch them and I pray that their parents don't take anything for granted. I know that I did up until we were told you had Trisomy 18. I didn't think about the "ones" in the statistics. You were one of the "ones" Hogan. You were chosen by God. You have changed lives. You have changed hearts! I told your mom earlier while you were snuggled up to her that you were a "lover" and a "fighter". You are 3 lbs. of power and love!

Hogan, we could have lost you very easy this afternoon. I appreciate you hanging around a little longer. Let's just keep fighting through every day every hour together. Let's ask God to give us protection and to give us the ability to block out all of the clutter and to focus on the task at hand. Thank you God for another night together and thank you for all of our friends that continue to life us up. Hogan, we are truly blessed.

I love you.

G-Day in Athens, GA

2010-04-10T10:27:00.009-04:00

Dr. Morales checking Hogan this morning.

A good feeling.

Hogan loves being held by his mom.

The fist of a young warrior. You can almost see his determination and fight in that fist!

Many people are going to the annual spring game (G-Day) here in Athens today to watch the bulldogs play a practice game. We are at the other end of Baxter street watching a different battle. It looks like a beautiful day outside of Hogan's window here at the St. Mary's NICU in Athens, Georgia!

Hogan continues to be stable. Dr. Morales is making sure that we are comfortable with the equipment that will be used at home. He is stable today. Hogan is not better and it is not worse today. He is still alive and still fighting! Thank you God!

I hope you and your families enjoy your weekend. Thank you for loving Hogan. Thank you for your prayers for Hogan. We are so thankful. I wish you could all meet him. Hopefully that will happen one day! Hogan loves you.

On a Mission.....

2010-04-09T23:17:00.004-04:00

Hogan, my hero!

I love this picture.... happy mother and happy little boy.

Hogan is ready to get out of his isolette to let his mommy hold him tonight!

Hogan was ready for Angie to pick him up!!

Angie waiting to get her hands on the little man!

This I declare of the Lord; He alone is my refuge, my place of safety; he is my God and I am trusting him. Psalm 91:2 NLT

So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and in his good time he will honor you. Give all of your worries and cares to God, for he cares about what happens to you. 1 Peter 5:6,7 NLT

Dear Hogan,

I thought that you might have a rough day after your alarms went off a few times last night but today was a great day. You are one week old now!! Congratulations!!! I am so glad you are here. I can't believe that we are sitting here beside each other one week after your first night at the NICU. You have come a long way and been through a lot in your short time here on this earth. We were very happy you were so alert today! I can't wait to read you all of the messages that you got today from your friends all over the world. So many prayers are being lifted up for you Hogan. God continues to use your fragile body in such an amazing way. You are loved by so many people. I can't tell you how much it means to read all of the messages and words of encouragement we get every day. You have some amazing friends!

You would be pretty impressed with your "nurse in training" mom. I think her radiation therapist experience has helped her be so easy to teach. She is becoming quite the nurse. She is being taught how to take care of you by some of the most incredible nurses I have ever met! Your mom and I feel so blessed that they are working with us so diligently. They want us to feel very comfortable before we take you home next week! Yes, I know that is a few days away Hogan but I know you are a fighter. I know you can do it! I will not take anything for granted with you but I won't doubt you either. I will always be here for you Hogan. We aren't going anywhere.

Your mom and I were talking to a nurse friend of yours downstairs today at lunch in the cafeteria and we think that you might be a pretty crafty little boy! We think you are beginning to really show your personality. I think you have figured this place out! You always did flips when you were at Dr. Rosemonds office. Candace and Dr. Rosemond were always amazed by how you played tricks with them during a visit. You also started changing your blood flow in the few weeks before your birth which caused you to come to St. Mary's a little early and be monitored. It seems as though there is a pattern developing here Hogan. I actually think I saw you smile today when Dr. "V". walked in your room to see you for the first time since birth. Yes, this was the doctor that told us you had at a maximum five to seven days. I am beginning to think that you set your alarms off periodically just to get your nurse friends in here to check on you. Nurse Laura better watch out tonight! You are are pretty crafty. I think you are a pretty funny little guy.

Dr. "V"was impressed with your strength and your fight when he saw you today. He commented on how much better your breathing was today. He noticed that you weren't as stressed as you were the first day you were here at St. Mary's last friday. I think he was very impressed with your warrior qualities! He wants you to live Hogan! Dr. V. is a great doctor that knows that you have huge heart! Hogan, I think that he knows it and many people that have read your story know it too. You have a certain toughness but you also have a tender side too. Thank you so much for fighting Hogan. I think you are on a mission!

I also wanted to let you know that your mom got out of the hospital tonight for a few minutes. She has been with here with you for a week without leaving. I think it was very healthy for her to go home and see your brother and sister. They were so happy to see her too! Noah and Lily are praying for you. They are wanting you to come home to see them. Noah wants you to watch him build "tracks". Lily wants to see what you are eating! :-) Keep fighting little guy. I don't think your mission on this earth is over yet. I am so proud of you.

I love you.

Hogan is 1 Week old today!

2010-04-09T12:54:00.006-04:00

Good Morning Hogan!

It's so hard waking up in the mornings!

HAPPY 1 WEEK BIRTHDAY HOGAN!!!! 7:55 AM

Hogan with his mom this morning.

Can you tell Angie was happy to hold Hogan this morning!?!

Thank God we can keep changing Hogan's numbers!! 7 Days Old 7 Days Strong!!

Hogan is having a good 1 week birthday! Dr. Morales just stopped by for Hogan's daily visit. Hogan continues to be stable. Thanks for all of the Birthday messages and the many prayers and comments that you have sent to him! God Bless all of you!

Hogan is still alive and kicking!

2010-04-08T23:58:00.001-04:00

Hogan got to wear real clothes today! This was his 2nd outfit. Hogan's dog liked it!

Hogan is a beautiful baby with an enormous heart! We are so blessed.

Hogan is glad to be done with the bath! (not his favorite thing to do!)

Angie is amazing. Hogan is a lucky little guy and...so am I!

I had to hold my little warrior when I got the chance today!

Dr. Dana Hogan and Angie standing beside Hogan. Dr. Hogan cares so much about us. We are blessed with so many amazing doctors and nurses.

"For the mountains may be removed and the hills may shake, but my loving kindness will not be removed from you, and my covenant of peace will not be shaken, says the Lord, who has compassion on you." Isaiah 54:10

Dear Hogan,

I don't like to wish any time away but I look forward to spending our "guy's night out" time with you every night in the NICU. I am so thankful that your night was a good one again last night and I hope that your night tonight will be just as good!

You were so active and alert today. I can't believe how awake you were for much of the afternoon. I hope that each day gets better for you little guy. I did notice you were playing with you heart rate a little bit earlier tonight. I don't mind if you do that during the day to make sure your mom, myself and the nurses are on our toes once in a while. I just hope that you don't set off your alarm with me tonight like you did a few nights ago! I don't want any alarms going off tonight Hogan! Let's sleep good so we can party at breakfast for your big one week birthday!!

I can't wait to read you all of the messages, texts, emails, messages and posts that I have gotten today. You have gotten so many comments that I can't even respond to all of them. I hope all of your friends know that each one of them is being read though. They have no idea how much your mother and I enjoy reading them. It is amazing how much strength and support that God is giving us through these messages. I love to read how God is using your little body to change lives.

I wanted to let you know that your mother and I were really interested in hearing Dr. Morales go over your ultrasound results today. We know that full blown Trisomy 18 babies like you have lots of health problems. We also know that you have always fought through problems with a peace about you that makes my heart feel so good. Dr. Morales told us that although there were a few minor things that showed up on the ultrasound, there were no major problems that concerned him right now. We are so thankful for a good report Hogan. Let's keep surprising him with your fight and toughness! Dr. Morales has been so good to you. He cares about you Hogan.

You had another first again today Hogan. Nurse Greta told us this morning that you had progressed enough to put on baby clothes! I know that your new outfit gobbled you up but when you are all muscle, even premature clothes look big on you! We did find out tonight that you are all the way up to 3 lbs. 2 oz. You are almost back up to your birth weight.

Hogan, if you can fight through one more night here in the NICU, you will be one week old tomorrow morning! I am so proud of you Hogan. You take everyday as a battle all in itself. You never take anything for granted. You don't get caught up in the small stuff. You are focused on your "point". You are focused on Jesus and you are on a mission here. I don't think that God is done working through you Hogan. I don't think you are finished on this earth!

I also wanted to let you know about another surprise. We are getting equipment delivered to our house tomorrow for you! You are going to have oxygen, an isolette, feeding equipment and an oxygen monitor. We are so excited that you have a chance to go home next week. We also know that you might not get to go home with us and use that equipment. We know that your situation can change at any minute. We also know that there are an enormous amount of prayers being lifted up for you. We will just take it slow and see how things go over the next few days. I thought I would just let you know because it is very clear to me that you like goals. You like to take on the small fights in life to reach the bigger goal. You know that this life is a continuous battle. You know that at any given time you can fall. That is why you focus on your point so much isn't it? You are truly amazing Hogan!

I am so honored that God has given me this special little package of life called Hogan. I wouldn't have it any other way! I know I am only your father here on earth. I know that your true Father is in Heaven. If the doctors and history is right, then you don't have many more days left on this earth. If I know one thing about you Hogan is that you won't look back on your life and say that you didn't live it to it's fullest. You take on every challenge with amazing strength. You trust in God in every thing you do. You always have a look of peace and contentment in your eyes. You are a trusting little man. You don't have any excuses and don't blame anyone for your problems. You are a special gift Hogan. You are a warrior. I will never give up on you. I know you have beaten many odds already and that you are more than capable of beating many more! The power of prayer can do amazing things. You are a miracle baby.

I pray that we can all celebrate your one week birthday tomorrow morning. I also pray that God will continue to use you Hogan. Hogan, you are my hero.

I love you.

"no major concerns" from Dr. Morales on the results from Hogan's ultrasound!

2010-04-08T11:26:00.009-04:00

April 8th and Hogan is still with us! We are so thankful.

Hogan was ready to eat this morning!

Hogan has entered his 7th day now!

Hogan got to put on his first outfit today!! He looks pretty sharp!

Hogan and his buddy "the dog" looking good for a picture this morning!

Hogan is having a good day after a great night last night. Hogan and I slept great in the NICU last night. This morning we got to dress Hogan with his first outfit! Dr. Morales said that there were no major concerns from the Ultrasound yesterday! He continues to be stable. We are so thankful for all of the prayers and encouragement from your messages. We are so blessed. Thank you.

Hogan continues to battle!

2010-04-07T22:47:00.004-04:00

I loved hearing Noah say "I love him" when he saw baby Hogan

Noah loved seeing his little brother and his mom today!!

My sister Robin and her son Logan drove down from Maryland to see Hogan tonight.

Angie enjoying one of the times she can hold Hogan.

A loving Mother.

Hogan without some of his accessories!!!

And we know that God causes everthing to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. Romans 8:28 NLT

Dear Hogan,

I wanted to let you know how happy I was that you had a great night. You didn't set off any alarms and you didn't lose your IV or anything last night! I am looking forward to another "guys night out" in the NICU with you tonight. I hope that your night is just as good as last night!

You had another first tonight. You got to meet your cousin Logan and your Aunt Robin from Maryland. They were impressed with your good looks and by the fact that you get to eat "fries and a shake" before you eat your meal every night! Your big brother Noah also came to see you today. He loves you so much Hogan. He is proud of his baby brother! You also had your first ultrasound of your stomach, gallbladder and kidneys to make sure everything is working the way it should. Dr. Morales had a couple of concerns. I know you didn't mind. You are a tough guy. You seem to like fighting through difficult situations!

Also, I know you have got to be tired from all of the past few days. You just take each battle as though you enjoy them! This morning your mom and I met with hospice to discuss plans to take you home if things continue improving. It sounds like your equipment is going to be delivered to our house on Friday morning and your mother and I will be trained to use the equipment Friday afternoon. I know it's a little scary but it's just in case Dr. Morales feels good enough to send you home with us next week. We won't take you home with us unless your environment will be almost as good as your current environment without the full time incredible nurses that you have here at St. Mary's. It seems as though hospice is going to be great though Hogan. They have been so good through your journey staying in touch with us and following your fight to live! They are praying for you and encouraging you too! The messages, prayers and notes keep coming in Hogan. I can't wait to tell you about all of them. I had someone from Denmark contact me today to let me she was praying for you. God is using your little body. I am so proud of you Hogan.

Dr. Morales did take off your lights today. No more shades for the moment! You also got to take off your IV! You have come so far this week. I know that you have major battles ahead and you want to go home with us but I can look at you and tell what you are thinking....Don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring it's own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today! Mat. 6:34 We can make plans but the Lord determines our steps. Proverbs 16:9 I totally understand Hogan! We will make plans but we are going to pray hard and trust God that just like in the past few months that God is with you and he will help us make a peaceful decision. Hogan, I started thinking about everything that I needed to get done this afternoon and started stressing myself out. It didn't take but a few minutes to think again about what I was stressing over and realize that I wasn't thinking clearly. Here you are with your entire body not really working correctly and you are fighting through every breath. You should be the one stressed and your aren't. You have a look of complete peace about you Hogan. I am so proud of you and thankful that you are here.

I do hope that we can take you home with us but I am just happy to be sitting beside you typing tonight. You have inspired me to "make memories". You have inspired me to attack life and enjoy every battle. God is teaching me while I watch you battle every day. Thank you Hogan.

I love you.

April 7th.... afternoon update!

2010-04-07T12:25:00.005-04:00

Hogan continues to fight! He had a great night and has had a busy but good morning. Dr. Morales met with us earlier and allowed the "lights" to be taken off Hogan and the IV to be taken out! He has requested an ultrasound of Hogan's stomach and his kidneys for this afternoon to see if there might be a problem. Hogan is wouldn't feel right without ultrasounds and camera shots!! He has fallen back below 3 lbs. but we aren't worried about that... we know it's all muscle! Thank you for your continued prayers. We can't thank you enough. We are blessed.

April 6th .... Good Night Hogan

2010-04-06T23:59:00.007-04:00

Thankful to be holding our little warrior Hogan!

HOGAN (DAY 5)

Hogan's Grandmother couldn't hold back the tears of joy holding Hogan!

Hogan's Nana and Papa were so excited to get to hold Hogan tonight!

"Consider it pure joy my brothers when you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance." James 1: 2-3

Dear Hogan,

I am so happy that you had a great day. You woke me up at 3AM last night and scared me. Nurse Laura noticed that your IV was leaking and you had lost fluid in your isolette. Nurse Laura and her friend helped get your isolette clean with new sheets and got your IV back in and restarted. I know it wasn't a fun thing for you to go through but they got you back going again! You are amazing Hogan. I hope that we have a good night tonight. I always look so forward to our traditional "guys night out" in the NICU! I pray that your night is peaceful and that you awake to another day that was better than today. I look forward to holding you at 9AM!

I am glad that you had some more firsts today. Your nana and grandmother both got to hold you for a minute today. It might not have been long but I think that their love for you got even deeper and I didn't think that was possible. I know you could see the tears of joy in their eyes as they held you. I haven't seen them that excited in a long time. There is just something about you little guy. Your strength and determination to live and beat the odds is so inspiring to me!

I also wanted to let you know about our meeting today. I know you couldn't help but hear us talk about it in your room yesterday. It brought back memories from our meeting a couple of months ago here in the NICU to discuss the plans of your arrival. This meeting was to talk about plans of maybe taking you home next week! Yes, Dr. Morales is still saying that your life will be measured in days and not weeks and that your time in this world will not be long but at least this was a meeting that gave us hope that you might could go home to be with your brother and sister! Wow, how neat would that be!? I know we have a long way to go for all of this to happen but I know how you like to set goals and live each day like it could be your last! You have a gift of focusing on the small battles every day. I have learned a lot from you Hogan.

If we get to the point when you could leave the hospital you would still have to be in an isolette in our house and have all of your equipment and accessories that are similar to what you have here in your room at St. Mary's. Hospice has let us know that they can help us with all of this. What a blessing. It won't be easy transporting you to our home from the hospital but nothing has been easy for you has it!? You can do it Hogan. I know you can! I pray that God will continue to use your little body to make a difference in this world. You have touched a lot of people. I can't wait to read some of the messages to you tonight about what people are saying about you! They love you Hogan. I am so glad that you are here. I am so proud of you.

I love you!

April 6th afternoon update

2010-04-06T14:27:00.007-04:00

Hogan being comforted overnight with his buddy!

Sleeping Angel

Hogan being loved by Angie and Nurse Kemberly (Nurse Kemberly and Hogan bonded from the first time they met!) He loves every nurse here and I think they all feel the same way about him!

Good Afternoon! I wanted to give a quick update on Hogan. He is having a good day after a tough time last night. He lost his IV again during the night. He is good today though!! We had our big meeting with Dr. Morales, hospice and a few of the nurses that have been involved with Hogan today at 11:30. He continues to fight. He continues to be loved by everyone. He is a blessing to me. We are so thankful to spend more hours with him! THANK YOU all for the messages and prayers. I read them all. I read them often when I am with Hogan. I can't thank you enough for the prayers and support.

April 5th

2010-04-05T23:40:00.000-04:00

"So don't worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today". Matthew 6:34 NLT

Dear Hogan,

You have made it well into your 4th day now. I am so glad you are here. I am so impressed that you are fighting so hard to stay with us. It seems like everyday we throw something new at your that makes your life a little tougher. I know we have discussed this before but please remember that what doesn't kill us makes us stronger. You have got to be one of the strongest babies in the world by now! I am looking forward to laying down beside you in your room tonight. I don't think I have to remind you but remember.... you don't set off the alarms! If you want to wake up let me set a clock!

It is always great to see nurse Lisa in the morning. She has been here every day since you arrived and she feels like part of our family now. She worked with you in the delivery room to help get your little body started and she has been working with you every day since then! You have been so blessed Hogan. Nurse Kem came by to see you first thing this morning and so did nurse Tanya. They were so happy to see you Hogan. They have gone above and beyond to try and make your life as good as possible.

Do you remember Dr. Morales making his rounds before noon today? He gave us lots of good information as usual. He told us that you looked great and that you would start getting more food with extra calories! You have come such a long way since Saturday morning. You have started digesting your food good and you have started eating more. Nurse Lisa said that you were basically going to get a good healthy meal with some fry's and a shake to go along with it! I knew we had something in common! You got your good looks and your toughness from your mom and your eating habits from your me! I am so proud of you for eating so well. You need to do this so that you can get stronger.

Dr. Morales also said that your coloring concerned him just a little. He told us that there would be a test that would determine if you got some neat lights that shoot down on you in your isolette. It only took a couple of hours to get the results that he was right. Nurse Lisa got the necessary equipment into your room to get you lighted up! It is ironic that you have a big bright light shining on your every move Hogan. You look like an angel. I wouldn't just tell you that if I didn't mean it. You really look amazing. I especially like the neat "shades" that you have to wear to cover your eyes. Speaking of your eyes, we are hoping that your medicine will help clear up your eye infection. I know it can't feel good but hopefully it will be better soon. You are one tough cookie.

It was great to see Dr. Rosemond today. He made a surprise visit to see you Hogan. I could tell that you wanted to flip around and change your blood flow for him like you did when he was studying your ultrasounds but it is a lot tougher to move around outside of your mom! I know you appreciate all of the time that Dr. Rosemond spent with us over the past few months. He was a tremendous blessing getting you to a live birth.

You mother and I enjoyed our celebration dinner tonight. We had a celebration dinner here at St. Mary's after Noah and Lily were born and this one was just as good. I think every dinner or meal with you should be a celebration meal! I know you are probably getting a little nervous about the next few days after Dr. "V" mentioned Friday afternoon that he didn't think you would live a week. I don't want you to think about that unless you think about it in a way that makes you want to prove him wrong! I have watched you fight over the last few months to beat many odds Hogan. I wouldn't bet against you. I think God isn't finished with you yet. I pray that God continues to use you.

I have to tell you something that will hopefully make you feel really good. We are having a meeting with hospice, nurse Tanya, Dr. Morales and nurse Lisa tomorrow to discuss plans to get our house ready in case you continue your miracle life. Can you believe that Hogan!?!? We are having a meeting to talk about what we can do to get you home in a few days. I know that Noah and Lily would love to have you home so that they could see you. Hogan, keep fighting big guy. I am here with you and many others. There are so many prayers going up for you. God is using your little body to change lives. God is using you to teach me big lessons and little lessons.

Although it pains me that I can't look into your eyes as often now that you have your "shades". It makes me look forward to the three times a day we get to see your beautiful eyes. I am thankful that you are still here Hogan. If you see my crying at times during the day, remember what I told you. These are not tears of sadness. These are tears of joy.

I can't wait to read you some of the messages that people have sent to you today. Hogan, I have never seen God use a little baby in such a glorious way. Nobody is giving up on you Hogan. Let's stay focused on our point. I know it gets a little intimidating thinking about how to get you home and what equipment would be needed and it is also intimidating to know that your heart specialist told you that you wouldn't be with us on Friday at the latest. Stay focused Hogan. That point that we have been focusing on during this entire journey has been Jesus. Let's stay focused on him and forget about all of the distractions. Remember it is you that has taught me to never take a breath for granted. It is you that has taught me about true beauty. Thank you for being you.

I love you.

Day 4 for Hogan!

2010-04-05T12:31:00.002-04:00

Hogan has had a great night and day. He didn't wake me up with his alarms going off this morning. He has had all of his pals back that work at St. Mary's that were off for Easter. Dr. Rosemond even made a special visit to see him. We are so thankful for all of the prayers and support that are coming Hogan's way. I just wanted to give a quick update. Angie, Noah, Lily and I can't thank you enough for praying and loving Hogan. A friend of mine said something funny to me one time. He called someone "Elmer". I asked why are you calling him "Elmer"? He said because he is the glue that keeps it all together! I thought that was funny. Hogan is the "glue" that is keeping us all together! He is a gift from God and every breath continues to be a miracle. I look forward to writing another letter to Hogan tonight. God Bless you!! In His Love, Kip

Hogan enjoyed his Easter Sunday

2010-04-04T23:33:00.002-04:00

Angie getting to hold Hogan "skin to skin" They were both very happy!

Hogan liked the new hat that nurse Lisa picked out today!

Candace Brown, Angie and Hogan

Hogan

Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from Him. Psalm 127:3

Dear Hogan,

Thank you for one of the best Easter's ever. I think that God has a great plan for you. You don't have to wake me up tomorrow like you did today. If you want me to set my alarm please tell me! You don't have to make your alarms go off and play with your oxygen levels and heart rate. Please don't do that again tonight buddy. You can just sleep until morning and I will set an alarm clock for us. Thank goodness that nurse Amanda was there quickly and a helper to get your numbers back up. I have always been a scoreboard watcher in sports and now you have turned me into a monitor watcher! I heard that Butler was going to play Duke tomorrow night for the National Championship in basketball. Can you believe a tiny school like Butler would be able to play for a National Championship? Of course you can! You remind me a little of that team Hogan. You are a bulldog at times. You are a fighter. Thanks for winning the fight early this morning and thanks for winning many battles today. You are always going to be a champ in my book.

Dr. Morales told us that you had been here long enough to double your food intake today! You have gone from under a teaspoon every three hours to just over a teaspoon every three hours. I hope you can start putting on some muscle weight little man. He also has changed your living quarters. You have graduated to a isolette. You no longer are going to use the open heated bed. Dr. Morales is recommending that you stay in your isolette to help decrease your dehydration and it give you a quiet environment. The only downside is that you aren't as easy to touch but guess what!!?!? You are still here and you enjoyed 3 days here at St. Mary's and I hope that you enjoy your third night tonight!

I noticed you were excited that nurse Lisa brought you an Easter bunny this morning. He seemed to enjoy laying in your bed with you today. Your dalmatian seems to be your favorite though. He loves sleeping around your head or around your back. It seems like you guys are quite the team! Hogan you have taught me so much already and you continue to teach me.

Tonight was extra special because it was the third time we got to hold you. Yesterday was such a stressful day with your first bath, your feeding tube coming out and your IV coming out... I am glad that today was a little less stressful for you. I think your mom loved having you lay skin to skin on her chest tonight. I could see the love in her eyes the moment you both touched. She is feeling lots better than she was last night. She loves you so much Hogan. I know you love her too. Your stats stayed perfect for almost 4o minutes on her chest. You might be a young warrior but you love your mother!

I can't wait to read your messages to you again tonight. Your friends and prayer warriors are still sending up prayers to Heaven for you. They love you Hogan. You are loved by so many people. I am overwhelmed each day by the support that you are getting. It was perfect timing too because I know you are probably a little exhausted.

I enjoyed getting some pictures of you meeting your ultrasound technician Candace Brown from Dr. Rosemond's office this afternoon. You guys created a unique bond over the past few months and I know you consider her part of the family. She made a sacrifice to come see you today Hogan. She loves you. She was so worried about you after our last ultrasound. We thank God for all of the special people that have touched your life. It seems as though all of the people that are assigned to you are Angels. We are so blessed.

I am going to sleep in your room tonight again. Remember we have "guys night out thing" going in the NICU. I don't want you to pull any more scary tactics again like last night though! I love you buddy. You are so much fun. I can't wait to hold you again in the morning and to celebrate your "3 Day" birthday at 7:55AM.

I love you.

Hogan is a true warrior

2010-04-03T23:58:00.001-04:00

Jesus also used this illustration: "The Kingdom of Heaven is like yeast used by a woman making bread. Even though she used a large amount of flour, the yeast permeated every part of the dough." Matthew 13:33 NLT

Hogan, you may be a small ingredient in this world but you are making a huge impact. I know because your little body and spirit has changed my life forever. You are a special gift from God. Thank you God for another day with Hogan. Angie and I are so thankful for this blessing.

Dear Hogan,

Wow, what an amazing day! I understand why you are so tired. I know today doesn't compare to the drama that unfolded yesterday but life on the outside is tough.

I enjoyed sleeping in you room last night. Thank you for letting me sleep with you. I think this "guys night out" thing upstairs in the NICU is pretty fun. We don't have anything to distract us up here. I also enjoyed being able to feed you for the first time by myself last night before we went to bed. Although you aren't eating much it feels so good to know you are getting something to eat. I feel like I am living in a dream. A dream that I hope will keep going. I will never forget these days we are sharing together.

I know you were happy when your mom was able to come up to feed you this morning. She was a beautiful sight for my eyes too. I knew where you got your good looks but I thought you got your toughness from me. I am certain you got your good looks and your toughness from your mom though!

I was sorry that you couldn't digest your food to well this morning. They tell me that this isn't too uncommon for Trisomy babies. Nurse Lisa is working with you though. She is doing her best to get your systems working they way they need to work. Your mom and I gave up our afternoon "holding time" because you got to get your first bath!! I love a good hot bath sometimes and I really thought you would like it too. I think your mom and I quickly realized that you might not be a bath fan. Although you are packed with lots of power your smaller frame doesn't allow you body to warm like normal babies so we have to keep you under heat constantly. I don't blame for liking the warmth though. It does feel pretty good when I put my hands under your warm air.

Your mother and I wanted to hold you tonight but we realize that you have had a stressful day and we don't want to stress you out any more right now. We want you to get some rest. Your heart is working hard. I forgot to tell you yesterday that Dr. "V" told us that you had a large heart relative to the rest of your body. I thought that was a little ironic. I think lots of people know you have a huge heart Hogan!

I was glad that I was up here to see your new best friend nurse Lisa before she left for the night. She was trying to catch nurse Amanda up on all of your situation and woke you up. It was a bad thing that she woke you up but a good thing that you are showing emotion! You were so mad after your bath today and you were a little angry at nurse Lisa for a few minutes. I can't tell you how much it meant that she stayed around to make sure you were stable and happy again before she left to go home. She loves you so much Hogan. Nurse Lisa decorated your window in your room today and she also got foot and fingerprints of you for us. You should see your window from the other side.. wow! It is awesome.

Hogan, it seems that more and more people are praying for you. I can't wait to read you the messages from today. Your mother and I are so proud of you and enjoy them too! We are so blessed. We are so happy you are here. We are thankful for this day. God is using you Hogan. Everyone has told me how good they think you look. I think you are a good looking little man too. I believe everyone is impressed with all of the cool accessories you are wearing! I know the cords are not fun to wear but they are necessary right now. Let's just take one step at a time and let's beat some more odds.

Nurse Amanda weighed you tonight. You are now under 3 lbs. I am the one that needs to lose some pounds Hogan, not you!! There is one thing for sure. You are a lean, mean, fighting, warrior machine! Let's get back together again tomorrow night about the same time and place. I love watching you sleep so peacefully. Good Night Hogan.

I love you.

Day 2 for Hogan!!

2010-04-03T14:01:00.002-04:00

Hogan is stable today. He is not digesting his food well but looks great! Hopefully that will improve soon. We are about to give him his first bath! I just wanted to give a quick update because you are prayers continue to work. We are so happy. Thank you. I hope you can all meet him one day! In His Love, Kip

Happy Birthday Hogan!

2010-04-03T00:50:00.003-04:00

Hogan Sayer Dominy

Beth Sayer Skelton, Hogan Sayer Dominy, Kay Hogan Dominy

All praise to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. He is the source of every mercy and the God who comforts us. 2 Corinthians 1:3

Dear Hogan,

The journey has finally taken a new turn. You came into this world at 7:55AM weighing 3 pounds 3 ounces and you were 16 1/2 inches long! I am so glad you are here. I know your mom is missing feeling you kick tonight but she is sleeping soundly downstairs ready to get her hands on you in the morning! I know you know all about how great your mother is but you would have been so proud of her today after you went upstairs. She was in a wheel chair and up to see you in record time. She was in the NICU in less than an hour after surgery. Your mom is one tough cookie. I see where you get your toughness from now. I thought I was tough but your mom is incredible. She couldn't wait to be able to spend time with you.

You had so many people praying all morning. I know you can't believe it but there were even more people and people were praying harder for you at 7:30 this morning that your mom and I felt a peace during your birth that passes all understanding. I was crying during your birth but it wasn't of sadness, it was joy. I was so happy that you made it here. Your mom and I have asked for the prayer of a live birth for months. The Lord heard our prayers and the prayers of many others that love you.

You had a little trouble getting going this morning but your friends at St. Mary's worked hard to help you. I have to tell you something.... You were like a rock star coming out of your mom's surgery! You were welcomed by many friends and family on your way upstairs. Hogan, you handled yourself very well.Teresa Vickery has got all the pictures to prove it!

Once we got upstairs you got all kinds of accessories put onto you to help make your transition into this world a little less stressful! You even got to spend a quick moment with your big brother Noah and your big sister Lily. I know you have heard them for months but it was great that you guys all got to hang out together eye to eye! Do you remember Noah kissing you on the head? Do you remember Lily touching your head? They both love you so much. Noah even told you he loved you! Noah even told mom that her belly was broken!

You were so lucky to have Ms. Lisa working with you today. She helped you stay comfortable and explained everything so clearly to me. Ms. Kemberly and Ms. Tanya were amazing as always. You have gotten to know those two ladies well over the past few weeks. They love you Hogan. So many people love you Hogan. You should see the people that are following what God is doing. You are a hero to a lot of people. I was also glad that you got to see your grandparents this afternoon. Debbie, Nathan, Leah and Jamie were glad to see you too. You remember how you got your name right?!? You were named in honor of your grandmothers. They are so proud of you!

Your mom and I were anxious to hear what the doctors had to say this afternoon. We were told that Dr. V and Dr. Morales would tell us in detail how your heart was doing along with other things. Your heart is just like we were told it would be in our meeting a couple of months ago at Dr. Rosemonds office. The problem is that you are a lot smaller than we thought you would be when you entered this world. That is causing some problems because you have been such a strong warrior over the past 9 months that you are starting to get a little tired. I can understand because you have show more heart than I have in my entire life. You are amazing. They tell us that your weeks might now be a few days. They have told us that your fight might be over sooner than later. You are a tough guy. I know you can beat the odds again. I know you can make it!

I am so thankful that I got to spend today with you. I am so happy that you got to meet friends and family while you were taken to your suite in the NICU! You have so many friends and family that weren't here that were praying their hearts out for you. They are continuing to pray Hogan! So many people love you, I know you can't comprehend it right now because I can't either. Your mom and I are overwhelmed with the love, prayers and encourgement.

It has been fun typing this letter while sitting by your side. I think I will just stay here tonight by your side in the NICU and make sure you I am here if things start to get worse. Ms. Joy assured me that your mom is resting and well taken care of downstairs.

They are giving you a good bit of oxygen to help you buddy. Hang in there. I don't think your mission is accomplished yet. Hogan, you have accomplished so much already. I am so glad you are here Hogan Sayer Dominy.

I love you.

HOGAN IS HERE!!!!!!

2010-04-02T11:18:00.004-04:00

HOGAN

We have a beautiful little Trisomy 18 baby boy! He came into this world weighing 3 lbs. and 3 ounces! God is so good. We have prayed since November for a live birth and we got it! I can't tell you how excited we are to have Hogan here. Thank you so much for your prayers. He is doing alright right now. He has some of the characteristics that go along with Trisomy 18 that just make him more special! I couldn't be more proud of him. Angie is doing great and was amazing this morning. She is sleeping now. We have the heart specialist coming after lunch to check on his heart but right now he continues to fight to live. He is truly a "young warrior"!

I can't thank you enough for your prayers. I ask for continued prayers for Hogan because he is going to have a rough road ahead of him. I will try and update this blog later today or this evening to let you know how things are going. We are going to enjoy every breath right now!

Thank you for your prayers!!!!

We are pressed on every side by troubles, but we are not crushed and broken. We are perplexed, but we don't give up and quit. We are hunted down, but God never abandons us. We get knocked down, but we get up again and keep going. Through suffering, these bodies of ours constantly share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies.

Yes, we live under constant danger of death because we serve Jesus, so that the life of Jesus will be obvious in our dying bodies. So we live in the face of death, but it has resulted in eternal life for you. 2 Corinthians 4:8-12

It's almost time for Hogan!!

2010-04-02T04:18:00.003-04:00

We are up and getting ready to leave for St. Mary's. We are supposed to arrive at the hospital at 5:30AM and then have the c-section at 7:30 this morning. We were told that we should expect to have the birth around 8AM or a little before. I will try and update this blog with a quick update sometime before lunch. I will try and as early as possible but I have no idea what we are going to face in a few hours. THANK YOU for your prayers!

Dear Hogan

2010-04-01T23:23:00.007-04:00

Psalm 140:11-18 NLT

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body

and knit me together in my mother's womb.

Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!

Your workmanship is marvelous- and how well I know it.

You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,

as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.

You saw me before I was born.

Every day of my life was recorded in your book.

Every moment was laid out

before a single day had passed.

How precious are your thoughts about me, O God!

They are innumerable!

I can't even count them;

they outnumbered the grains of sand!

And when I wake up in the morning,

you are still with me!

Dear Hogan,

It has been a long road since we found out that you had this rare condition called Trisomy 18. We were told that the chances of you making it to a live birth were very slim. We read that most of the babies with Trisomy were girls and that boy babies weren't as tough as little girl babies and that because of this we really shouldn't expect to carry you to birth. You have proven the statistics wrong. You have beaten the odds. We are so close now and I pray that we get to hold you in a few hours. I can't wait to show you all of the cards, notes, messages, emails, posts and comments that have been sent to you. I can't even explain how many people have been praying for you. Your mom and I are so proud of you. Noah and Lily can't wait to meet you in the morning for pictures. Noah even has a little bear that he has started carrying around calling him "baby Hogan". You are going to have so much fun with your brother and sister. We are overwhelmed with the love and care for you and our family. We are truly blessed. You have fought a good fight son. I will be by your side for the rest of our journey together. I can't wait to introduce you to everyone. You already have so many friends that love you. You are so loved and our family is better because of you. The doctors, specialists, nurses and many others have really been good to you. They love you Hogan. They know you are special. They know there is just something about you that no one can explain. You have changed my life and I can't thank you enough for that. I am a better person because of you. I thank God for allowing me to be your father here on this earth.

I love you.

Trust in the Lord with all of your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

"I am so glad you are here"

2010-03-31T00:47:00.003-04:00

Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord. Psalm 27:14 NLT

This journey started on November 18th, 2009. This journey is about to take a turn in the road. We don't know what is beyond this next turn but we trust God that there is a plan.

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. Romans 8:28 NLT

The time is near. Hogan's date of birth has been set and hopefully Hogan can make it until Friday and be ready to come into this world full of life at 7:30AM at St. Mary's.

We had an idea that this week would be a big week for Hogan. We are into the 37th week of pregnancy with Hogan. Hogan has scared us a few times over the past few weeks and did again today at Dr. Rosemond's office. I think he actually is trying to let us know that he is ok and is just playing with our emotions sometimes! He already has quite a sense of humor. He not only flips around during doctors and hospital visits but he has also learned to change his blood flow at times too!

We met with Dr. Rosemond this morning and then had an afternoon appointment with Dr. Lowman. They decided late today that it would be best to go ahead with a scheduled C-section birth on Friday morning. I can't even describe the feeling of hopefully having Hogan on "Good Friday!". This is the day that Jesus gave his life so that we might have life, ETERNAL LIFE!

I chose to title this blog "I am so glad you are here", because this is what Noah said to me Monday morning when he woke up. I can't explain how good that made me feel. He has said it before and hopefully will say it again, but this time it was different. I had planned to go into the office early as usual on Monday morning but for some reason decided to be there when the kids woke up that day. Noah always wonders into our bedroom sometime between midnight and 7AM in the morning every night so he was in our bed Monday morning. Noah woke up and looked at me in the eyes and said "Dad, I am so glad you are here".

"I am so glad you are here"

I am so glad that Hogan is here! I am so thankful that my family is healthy and happy. I am thankful for such an amazing wife. I am thankful for the Doctors, specialists, nurses and staff that we have been blessed with along the way. I am so thankful that my son can say those words and see me with his eyes. I am so thankful that Lily Rose is so funny and can eat, and eat, and eat.. like her dad! :-) We are blessed. I AM SO GLAD THAT YOU ARE HERE TOO! I am so thankful for you! You are the person that is reading this blog. You are the one that has chosen to take the time to step into our lives to see how Hogan is doing and to see what God is doing. Thank you for loving Hogan. Thank you for loving our family. Thank you for your prayers. I AM SO GLAD YOU ARE HERE WITH US ON THIS JOURNEY.

The Lord is my light and my salvation- so why should I be afraid? The Lord protects me from danger- so why should I tremble? Psalm 27:1 NLT

April 5th or earlier....

2010-03-22T23:12:00.007-04:00

And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them. Romans 8:28 NLT

Hogan will be with us within the next two weeks.

It is hard to think about much but Hogan's upcoming arrival right now. We had initially planned for his arrival tomorrow because Dr. Rosemond had initially planned a meeting today and then if Hogan wasn't doing as good as he was two weeks ago then he would have set up the delivery tomorrow morning. This was the plan until the events of the past two weeks that I mentioned in my "It won't be long now" blog. We had the trips to St. Mary's a week ago and that caused our doctors appointments to be moved up a few days. Hogan's heart looked relatively good on the monitor last week so the decision was made by Dr. Rosemond and Dr. Lohman that if his condition stayed the same in this weeks monitoring and next weeks appointment that the delivery will be scheduled for April 5th.

This news was good and bad for me. I am so ready to meet our little boy and Angie is too. The problem is that we are both very scared about what we are about to face. I feel that for the first time in a while the end of this journey (the pregnancy) is about to end. We have been told that because he is inside of Angie that his heart is helped by Angie. When Hogan enters the world he will be on his own. We will see how his heart, lungs and digestion works then. I think we both feel that we want to see Hogan but in the same excitement to see him the fear of the unknown also creeps into our minds. It is almost as if we wish the pregnancy could last another 9 months if it would keep Hogan alive. We don't want the little man to leave us. I don't think we are ready for that right now. I don't think we would ever be ready or will ever be ready.

We are also praying for Noah and Lily. We are worried about Noah's transition into being the oldest brother and the unknown of how Hogan will enter this world. It has been very difficult not knowing exactly how to handle Hogan's situation with him. We already feel that Noah knows something is not right. Lily is still so young that she doesn't really understand what is happening. Noah is a tough little man and I know that he will love on Hogan so much if we are blessed with the opportunity to bring him home from the Hospital.

We have an appointment with Dr. Lohman on Wednesday of this week and then if that goes well we will go to another appointment next Tuesday with Dr. Rosemond. The appointments will determine if the April 5th birth date is going to be set or if Hogan will be taken a little earlier. I know we have been praying and we have had so many people praying for our family and Hogan over the past few months. We are so thankful and we appreciate your continued prayers. We need them now more than ever and so will Hogan.

Our journey with Hogan is about to take a turn in the next 2 weeks. We don't know what that new direction will look like right now but we are praying for the strength and guidance that only God can give us. We continue to ask for prayers for Hogan's live birth and I also ask for you to pray for Angie. She is having a tough time right now battling emotions that I can't imagine. When I come into the bedroom at night and see her holding her belly (Hogan)... it rips my heart out. I know what is going through her mind without a word being spoken. Hogan is a lucky little guy to have Angie as his mother. I am a lucky man to have Angie as my wife and my best friend. I am also so blessed to have friends, family and even people that I have never met that have been so supportive.

Thank you for your prayers, love and support.

Thank you for loving Hogan.

We can make plans, but the Lord determines our steps. Proverbs 16:9 NLT

the story behind the name "HOGAN"... and a quick update on things!

2010-03-17T20:48:00.001-04:00

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous hand. Isaiah 41:10

hogan Name Meaning and History
Irish: Anglicized form of Gaelic Ó hÓgáin ‘descendant of Ógán’, a personal name from a diminutive of óg‘young’, also ‘young warrior’.

HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!

It is interesting to me, although this third child was a surprise to us, we picked out the name so quickly. When we found out we were having a boy in our first pregnancy it took us a long, long time of looking through different books and websites until we reached an agreement on the name just a few days before Noah Kipling's birth. Lily Rose's name didn't even come quite as "fast". We finally picked her name out just before Angie went into labor. We had wanted to honor our mothers with her name and decided to name her "Lily Rose" because both our mothers and grandmothers loved flowers. My grandmother passed away when I was in college but she owned a flower shop at one time and had a love for beautiful flowers. My mother loves making arrangements and loves pretty flowers just like Angie's mother. Angie's grandmother has some of the most beautiful flowers you have ever seen in her flower gardens. We decided it would be best to name our daughter "Lily Rose" in honor of them.

This third child was different in many ways, we had the freedom to name this child whatever we wished. We also knew that this would probably be the last child for us. Hogan Sayer was to be the name for our little boy while Kaytie Sayer would have been the name of a girl. The moment the sonographer let the words fall off of her lips "it's a boy" we knew his name was Hogan Sayer! Angie even looked at me that day and said "Hogan" with excitement! It was a blessing because when we found out that Hogan had a severe condition, we had a name to pray. We named this third child after both of our mothers and Angie's grandmother. It was my mother that God used to give me the Christian foundation that I would fall back on time after time in my life and trust me I fell and continue to fall! Angie's parents had an amazing faith in God and were grounded just like my mother. We were also amazed to find out Hogan's name had an interesting meaning. We had no idea that a meaning for Hogan's name was "young warrior". I was contacted by a person we didn't know through a good friend of mine Clint Harris letting me know that Clint's friend was a Hogan and that she wanted to make sure we knew of this information.

As I mentioned earlier, the name "Hogan" was chosen to honor my mother. The name "Sayer" was chosen to honor Angie's mother. I have realized that while we honor our mothers with the name we have chosen for our third child, it is that my wife that is the mother that I admire just as much but in a different way. I know that I am dealing with Hogan's birth different than my wife. Hogan's mother is such an amazing woman. She is being the best mother to Noah and Lily while still battling emotions of having Hogan inside of her with a condition that is supposed to quickly end his life after birth. She is feeling this baby kick everyday, many times a day. She talks about him often kicking while we are having fun family time. She has been an inspiration to me. I continue to ask God why I have been so blessed in so many different ways. I thank God for loving mothers like my wife and for the love and support that our mothers have always given us.

I believe there is NO good death and I feel that infant/child death is even more horrible. Every infant/child death is bad. I have always wondered if it would be easier if "X". We are thankful that we do know Hogan has a battle ahead of time. We are thankful that so many people continue to pray for Hogan. We are thankful for technology and the Dr's and nurses that have been so helpful during this journey. We are trying to prepare ourselves in case a miracle of life isn't given to Hogan and although we try and prepare ourselves for "what could happen", we know that we can't do it. My heart goes out to anyone that has lost loved ones and especially their child or children. My heart breaks for you. We know people are going through life events that are so much tougher than ours. We continue to be blessed. Hogan continues to fight!

Today started off with notification that our marker at the cemetery was being put down at Oconee Hill this morning. I hope that we won't be using this area for a long time! We had a couple of Dr.'s appointments this afternoon. We saw Dr. Rosemond after lunch and we were happy to know that Hogan seemed to be doing relatively good considering his condition. His heart beat sounded fine and his growth hasn't deteriorated to be alarming at this time so we march on with the pregnancy. Angie is going to be monitored again next week and see Dr. Lohman. The following week we will meet back with Dr. Rosemond to make plans for the birth! If things go well then it looks like April 5th might be the date that Hogan will enter this world. The date could change if things get worse with Angie or Hogan but right now we are tentatively planning for that date. Dr. Lohman and Dr. Rosemond talked this afternoon and decided that we might even get to try a normal delivery. It was unbelievable that when the sonographer checked Hogan's position, he was still breech. A normal delivery wouldn't be an option. In the 10 minutes that we waited for Dr. Rosemond to come in to do his evaluation.... Hogan had turned! He is now head down. Hogan had been turned head up for the past couple of months. This would allow us to maybe have a normal delivery now.. if Hogan decides he wants one! Dr. Rosemond was amazed that the little man decided to move and get into the correct position for birth while we were in his office. I think Hogan already has a funny personality!

We continue to be so thankful for all of the support Hogan and our family have been given over this journey.

Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. Jeremiah 33:3 NLT

it won't be long now...

2010-03-13T11:13:00.002-05:00

Angie probably wouldn't have chosen this picture!

Don't worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. If you do this, you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 NLT

I have to start this blog out by thanking you for your prayers. I know that your prayers are having an impact on our family. I also know they are having an impact on Hogan's life.

We are finally starting to realize that our journey is about to take a different turn in the road. Angie and I have been waiting to meet this little blessing since last fall and now the time is getting near. I feel that as the time gets closer the stress starts to get more intense but it is a different stress than normal. We are anxious to meet Hogan. We don't really know how he will enter this world. The verse above really speaks to me right now. We continue to pray for the miracle healing of Hogan. We continue to be thankful that he has beaten so many odds already. We continue to be amazed at the prayers and support that Hogan has been given. We are so thankful. I can't express the strength that Angie and I are both feeling and we know it comes from God and it comes from the prayers that have been lifted up already by so many friends and family members.

The roller coaster of emotions continues. I was told this week that the marker for the cemetary should be ready to be put in place next week. I hope the marker is going to be put there and it will serve as a reminder of the miracle of life that God is going to give Hogan! It is also a reminder that this life is temporary for all of us though. Angie and I went ahead and put our birthday's on our stones with the "dash". The reason I wanted to go ahead and do this is because just in case a miracle doesn't happen I don't want Hogan to be in the cemetary and nobody to know that we were the parents. He has changed my life and he has changed our family forever.

Hogan continues to fight for life. Angie had a normal checkup with Dr. Lohman's office on Wednesday afternoon. The checkup turned into a little more than we thought because after monitoring Hogan's heart rate, Dr. Smith noticed that the rate was not good enough for her to let it go without more evaluation. She sent Angie to St. Mary's to get this monitored for a longer period to make sure Hogan's condition hadn't deteriorated. When I was able to arrive at the hospital Dr. Lohman was in the room with Angie and she was happy to see the heart rate had improved but she told us that she couldn't let us go home because Angie had started having contractions! So, we waited for these contractions to slow or stop. It was after the third round of medication that the contrations calmed down and we were able to go back home for the night. There are many reasons that we don't want Angie to go into labor yet. Hogan is a very small baby because of Trisomy 18 and the longer he can stay inside of Angie in a good environment and grow the better. The other reason is that Hogan has decided that he doesn't want to come into this world conventionally and hasn't turned correctly yet. I think he might know something! We have been told that the C section would be less stressful on Hogan and this would allow him to have a better chance to live. Also, as I mentioned in an earlier blog, we were scheduled to go back to Dr. Rosemond on the 22nd to get the next ultrasound to check Hogan's blood flow. If the blood flow is worse than it was on the 7th then Dr. Rosemond mentioned he might schedule the delivery the following morning the 23rd. This appointment is going to be moved up to this week. We are not sure what day but Angie's doctors want Dr. Rosemond to check on Hogan because of the heart rate problem he had on Wednesday afternoon.

Thursday night Hogan decided that he wanted to go back to St. Mary's again. We noticed that the contractions were getting closer together at dinner that night and decided to write down how often they were occurring. Angie had 6 contractions within 60 minutes so she called the Dr. like we had been told. Dr. Lohman didn't want to take any chances and sent us to get checked monitored again. I had a peaceful feeling that things would be ok again but just in case I packed my Bible, camera, phone charger and other things in a bag on this trip. We got to the hospital around 8:30 and after being monitored for a while and more medication we got to leave after midnight to come home. Angie is still pretty exhausted but we are happy that Hogan is still alive and ok inside of her today.

The good thing about being back at St. Mary's this week was that Angie and I were able to sit for hours and listen to our little man's heart beat. It brought back so many memories of Noah and Lily's birth and it really reminded us how big of a God we serve. We got to talk about things that we probably wouldn't have talked about if we were at home. We got to hear Hogan kick and kick and kick!! He might be a soccer player one day! It also brought a smile to my face to hear and see the babies that were born on Wednesday and Thursday night this week. It makes me so happy to see babies now more than ever.

I also noticed the "coach" shirts one of the dad's that had just watched his baby enter the world. I have 2 "coach" jersey's in my closet at home and look forward to getting my third jersey soon. I know you can tell it's march madness when I hear Hogan's heart beating and it reminds me of a basketball bouncing and then I see "coach" shirts at the hospital and it makes me think of coaching sports. I feel it is appropriate for the hospital to give out these shirts to the new dad's because we are life coaches for our children.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from his love. Death can't, and life can't. The angels can't, and the demons can't. Our fears for today, our worries about tomorrow, and even the powers of hell can't keep God's love away. Whether we are high above the sky or in the deepest ocean, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39 NLT

March Madness

2010-03-06T20:55:00.004-05:00

For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 NLT

Well, it's that time of year again. The time of year when the grass starts to turn green, the days get longer and basketball tournaments are in full force. I grew up in Dublin, Georgia so it also means St. Patrick's festivities and soon to follow will be Easter and the Masters. I think I have numerous favorite times of the year and this is definitely one of them.

This year March Madness has a whole new meaning for us. After 16 weeks of an emotional roller coaster since finding out about Hogan's condition, the time of his arrival is getting near. The anxiety is starting to escalate and so are the prayers for us. We continue to pray that we will have a live birth and that God will give us as much time as possible with Hogan. We have had to plan for death but we hope and trust that God can heal Hogan. We continue to draw on the prayers from our friends and family and try to focus on our "point".

I mentioned NILMDTS in one of my earlier blog posts. Teresa Vickery is the local photographer that is part of this incredible organization. She just happens to work part time at St. Mary's in labor and delivery and is also a very talented photographer that makes incredible pictures of babies. Teresa has been so good to us. She told me in December that she would do whatever we needed and for me to call her no matter when Hogan decided to enter this world. She also told us that she would do pre birth pictures for Angie. We had the pictures made on Monday morning and they turned out incredible. We are so thankful that we have these pictures so that we can have memories in pictures. My wife is beautiful. She is the type of woman that is really pretty but just gets better looking the more you get to know her because of her amazing heart and spirit. The pictures that Teresa took captured both! Angie was stunning in the photos and Noah and Lily even stayed still long enough to get in some family shots! One of the photos that Teresa wanted to take was of me kissing Angie's belly while holding on to her with my left hand. Thank God she wanted this picture because the moment I kissed Angie's belly I felt Hogan move. It was a neat feeling for me. It was almost as if he felt the kiss. I didn't say anything at the time fearing I would have an "emotional moment" :) but it will be a memory that I will never, ever forget.

The other highlight of the day was a visit to see Dr. Rosemond that afternoon. We look forward to our visits now because it is a time we get to see Hogan. We get to hear his little heart beat and see him on the screen hanging on the wall in front of us. It is also a comforting feeling to get to visit with everyone that works there. His staff has been so good to us and Dr. Rosemond has never once acted like he needed to leave the room to go visit another patient. He always tells us that we have all the time we need. I can't explain how important that has been over the past few months.

Dr. Rosemond went into more detail about one of the concerns for Hogan he has right now. One of the things he is watching is the blood flow for Hogan. He wants us to be monitored over the next couple of weeks to make sure that Hogan doesn't get into distress. We will go see Dr. Smith next week for a weekly visit. If Hogan can hang in there a couple of more weeks until the ultrasound with Dr. Rosemond again on the 22nd I will be relieved. We were told that after the ultrasound on the 22nd that we would either go for a few more days or if the blood flow gets worse we will have Hogan on the 23rd of March. This was a shock for Angie and I. We were thinking we would have Hogan in April. It looks like the chances of us making it to April are slim now.

As each day passes it seems that we are leaning on each other and God more and more. I know that I can't think straight these days and have been making more notes than ever to stay focused on things that I have to get done at work. It is actually a blessing to be busy at work because it helps me take my mind off of things during the work day although my mind can't help but "go there" frequently. We went to Dublin on Tuesday for the FCA Banquet. We were there because a friend of mine was going to be the main speaker for the event. It was about 20 minutes into the program that the local director of FCA started talking about different blessings with different coaches etc. and giving examples of great things that God has done. He then told the crowd that he had a special prayer request. He wanted everyone to lay hands on each other at each table and pray for Hogan and our family. Angie and I were overwhelmed and are still overwhelmed by the emotion that night. I can't explain the feeling that went through me but I know that I couldn't fight back the tears and I couldn't focus on anything that night but just how great God is. We are so blessed. We are so thankful. We can't thank everyone enough for loving Hogan and loving us.

I can't end a "March Madness" titled blog without getting in a little basketball. I was thankful for getting a ticket at the last minute to watch the Georgia/Kentucky game on Wednesday night. The game didn't end the way I wanted but it was fun to watch such a talented team like Kentucky play. Although the game was action packed and the Stegman Coliseum was electric, my mind drifted at times. I thought about how many people were probably going through tough times in their life in that coliseum. You just never know what people are going through. Someone told me a couple of months ago about a decision that they were trying to make and how tough it was on them. After they finished talking about their stressful decision, they asked me how my Thanksgiving went... well we found out about Hogan's condition the week of Thanksgiving so I just told them it wasn't the best Thanksgiving we had ever experienced. They immediately told me how they weren't going through anything compared to us and even felt silly to be stressed about their problem. It was important what they were facing. The decision that was being made was a huge one that could change that person's life. It may not have been life and death but it was important.

The other thing that kept creeping into my mind was hearing Noah ask me to help "build a bridge" with him when I was leaving for the game. I hated that feeling! I told him that I loved him and that I would build the bridge with him the next morning. I couldn't wait for Noah to wake up the next morning so I could play with him before leaving for the office. I am so thankful for the job I have that enables me to spend most nights with my family.

I know we are going to through a stressful time but I also know that we aren't the only ones that are hurting and have hurt. My heart goes out to everyone that has lost a loved one and especially a child. I know I can't imagine how we are going to feel if the Doctors are right and God doesn't heal Hogan. I can try to imagine it, but I can't. I only know how we are feeling at this moment facing this miracle birth that might happen soon.

I try not to mention many names in my blogs because I can't name everyone that has touched our lives during this journey. Thank you again for your continued prayers, the amazing cards, meals, emails, messages, texts, notes and calls. I know that I couldn't type without the amazing support that we have been given and the amazing love for Hogan that has been shown. He is an amazing little baby that continues to beat the odds and continues to fight for life. I am so proud of him and can't wait to hold him and tell him face to face.

...Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs, and he will give you all you need from day to day if you live for him and make the Kingdom of God your primary concern. So don't worry about tomorrow because tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today's trouble is enough for today. Matthew 6:32-34 NLT

Extensive Care

2010-02-25T22:14:00.013-05:00

hogan Name Meaning and History
Irish: Anglicized form of Gaelic Ó hÓgáin ‘descendant of Ógán’, a personal name from a diminutive of óg‘young’, also ‘young warrior’.

Hogan is a young warrior! He continues to fight for life and to be with us.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do and he will direct thy paths. Proverbs 3:5,6 NLT

These verses are ones that provide strength. These verses are ones that provide hope. We continue to try and focus on the "point" as we get closer to the due date for Hogan. The day that we have been praying for is now getting close!

Although we are trusting God, as the days pass the stress and anxiety seem to be mounting. I think after the initial shock and heartbreak of hearing of Hogan's condition of Trisomy 18 in November, we have been in a holding pattern. What I mean by that is we have been thankful for every day that passes that Hogan is still alive and safe inside of Angie's womb while hoping that April will get here and that we will be able to meet Hogan with a live birth. Hogan is kicking often now and I can even see and feel the kicks on Angie's belly!

This afternoon was the "big meeting" with the doctors, nurses and hospice representatives at St. Mary's Hospital in Athens. It was a strange feeling walking back into the place where we brought Noah and Lily into this world knowing that in a few weeks we might be back awaiting Hogan's birth. There were 7 people who attended the meeting other than Angie and myself. These were 7 people that were working past "normal office hours" in order to take the time to make sure we got any questions that we had answered and to make sure that we felt comfortable with what we might be facing in a few weeks. Dr. Rosemond, Dr. Lohman, Dr. Morales, Kemberly Mixon, Tanya Adcock, Teresa Scoggins and Karen Joyce were the ones that sacrificed their time to see us. It was a meeting for us to ask questions and for them to tell us what we could expect during and after the birth. Dr. Rosemond started the meeting by catching everyone up on our journey with Hogan. He went through everything that I have mentioned in previous blogs and it was tough for Angie. It was difficult meeting because we had to talk about things that broke our hearts but it was a meeting that we will never forget. It was a meeting that we will never forget not only because of the information we received, although it was very informative, but it was amazing to me how much care everyone had for us and Hogan. I am not trying to be a commercial for St. Mary's or any of these individuals and I am sure many hospitals are filled with caring people but we are very thankful that God has allowed us these individuals to be with us during this time.

If Hogan doesn't turn in the next month it looks like it is pretty certain that we will have a scheduled cesarean birth. It is also a good probability that we will have the baby in the first part of April if things keep going the way they look now on the ultrasound. We are praying that Hogan's heart will work as good as the pediatric heart specialist Dr. "V" told us a couple of weeks ago and we are also praying that Hogan's lungs will work well. It is also pretty normal for Trisomy babies to have eating problems so it would be incredible if Hogan could at least take a bottle. It was a also a neat meeting because it was mainly about what would happen after the birth. It gives me chills and brought tears to my eyes during the meeting when it hit me. We are now actually preparing for the live birth that was never thought possible in November!! We are getting close to meeting Hogan. It is a strange feeling because I get so excited thinking about the moment we will see him and then I try not to get my hopes up in case at this late stage that something bad happens. I know it is in God's hands and that we will give glory to Him regardless but the thought of being able to hold this baby that has beaten so many odds already is incredible to me. The meeting helped put our mind at ease because now we know how things will be handled after Hogan's birth. The NICU is where he will probably spend most of his time after birth so it was good to tour part of that area and to meet the people that will be caring for Hogan.

I know I mention this is every blog but it is important. Angie and I are so very thankful for everyone that has called, emailed, sent cards, spoken words of love and prayed for us. I don't think a day goes by now that I don't hear from someone that is letting me know that they are praying for us and baby Hogan. We are overwhelmed and blessed. I know that the power of prayer has given us strength and given Hogan strength. I continue to ask for your prayers as the due date draws closer. If you are reading this blog then you are someone I would like to thank. I can't wait for you to meet Hogan!

You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, because the work of the Son brings glory to the Father. Yes, ask for anything in my name and I will do it! John 14:13,14 NLT

For God hath given not us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love and self discipline. 2 Timothy 1:7 NLT

Hogan's Heart

2010-02-10T21:05:00.001-05:00

Noah and I made this incredible sun catcher today for Angie. It was "day with dad" day at his preschool. I don't think I could be more proud of my little man. We went by Fox's pizza on the way back home to get the "Noah Special". That is a bambino pizza with extra meat and no cheese. Noah can't have normal cheese pizza because of his allergies so we have to get his own personal pizza. I think Noah likes it because he gets his own pizza box!

This is the week that many celebrate Valentine's Day. It is the holiday that you see hearts everywhere. Noah made his sun catcher heart. He also made a heart card for his mommy and there are candy heart boxes everywhere. It is ironic on the week that we celebrate hearts so much that we have been dealing with Hogan's heart this week.

Dear Friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love. God showed how much he loved us by sending his one Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. 1 John 4:7-9 NLT

This verse was on the craft that Noah and I finished today at "Day with Dad" at his preschool. The craft was made for Angie and of course, she loved it! I also love the 9th verse because it showed us just how much that God loves us. God sent his son to die for us. He sacrificed his Son that we might all have eternal life. I was talking to a friend of mine this morning over breakfast and we were talking about Heaven and just how our minds can't really comprehend what Heaven is going to be like. Isn't is amazing?

I wanted to catch everyone up on a couple of things I mentioned in my last blog. I know many of you have been praying. Angie got a call yesterday afternoon from the doctor in Lawrenceville letting us know that everything was benign with her thyroid! That is one thing that we don't have to worry about having to address soon after Hogan is born. We are so thankful! I am so glad the doctor wanted to go ahead with the biopsy last week.

The other big event this week was the meeting with Dr. Rosemond and Dr. "V" the cardiac specialist today about Hogan's heart problems. I can't express the gratitude we have for the doctors that we have had the blessing of being with through this pregnancy. I have heard so many stories from friends about doctors not caring or not having good bedside manner but our doctors have all gone above and beyond to take time with us. Dr. V's real name is Dr. Videlefsky. Dr. Rosemond and Dr. Videlefsky spent over and hour with us looking at Hogan's heart and talking to us about his condition. They gave us the good news. It looks like Hogan's heart is not in good shape but not in horrible shape. That means that he could live for a little while!! We have gone from basically being told there is almost no chance for a live birth in November to a decent chance for a live birth last month to a chance we might could take Hogan home with us from the hospital if everything stays as good as the ultrasound looks right now! We will probably have to have a feeding tube for Hogan and maybe oxygen but he might be able to come home with us!! We have been praying for a live birth and continue to ask for those prayers. Angie and I both almost started crying today when they told us his heart could work for a while in the condition it was in today. We are so thankful for the hope that we have been given! Thank you for your continued prayers.

Why God? Why?

2010-02-06T22:01:00.011-05:00

We are getting closer and closer to the due date and I can feel the tightness in my chest. Although I am trusting God and trying to focus on him and trying to get mentally prepared for what we are going to face and knowing there is really no way to prepare for the emotions.

I am amazed at the strength of my wife. She is being so strong. We continue to be overwhelmed with the thoughts and prayers and well wishes from everyone. There are so many people that have been so thoughtful and nice to us and sympathetic to Hogan's situation that I can't even start to name anyone for fear of leaving someone out. Just know that if you are reading this post you are someone I want to thank! I know I mention how thankful we are in every post and its because it means more than I can explain! I know that God has given us strength through those prayers and I know that Hogan is feeling the prayers too!

I continue to ask God Why!? Why did I get blessed with such an incredible wife that I don't deserve? Why have we been blessed with 2 beautiful children so far and one on the way? I know there are so many people that can't have children. Why has God blessed our family so much with wonderful friends that care so much about us? Why are strangers praying for us? That is so incredible to me. Why are so many people being so kind and thoughtful? Why are you allowing us to experience the birth of such a special child that has overcome so many odds already? I may not know answers to all of these things but I do know that if I died tonight I would have died a blessed father and husband.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will direct your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6 NLT

Those verses seem to be the "point" that we are focusing on through this journey with Hogan. This week was quite a stressful one for me because we were going to see an endocrinologist about Angie's thyroid and yesterday we were going to see Hogan through an ultrasound at Dr. Rosemond's office again and these ultrasounds would be the ones that would help give us a closer look at the problems that Hogan is facing that are created by the Trisomy 18 condition.

The doctors appointments outcomes were both different than we had expected. We had thought that endocrinologist would just talk to us and tell us to come back to see him after Hogan was born because that was the recommendation that we had gotten from a couple of doctors here in Athens. It wasn't the case. We went to the appointment thinking it was just a consultation and left with Angie having an ultrasound on her thyroid, a biopsy and blood work done. This was a surprise because it seemed to me all along that the doctors wanted to wait until the baby was born because if this was cancer that there was nothing that could be done until Hogan was born. This whole thing is ironic because Angie had an appointment set up to get her thyroid checked the day after we found out we were expecting Hogan so they didn't want to do the normal tests because she was expecting. We have had it measured and blood work checked since then and were sent to Lawrenceville this week to see a specialist. This doctor wanted to go ahead and get it checked because it was half solid and half liquid. I am actually relieved that we will know the results before Hogan is born so that we will know how aggressive we need to be after he is born. This again is another example of how incredible of a wife I have! I asked her about it before we found out Hogan's condition and she told me that she would not do anything different if it was cancer. Angie gave radiation treatments to cancer patients as her profession until we had Noah. She told me that the cancer is usually slow growing in that area even if it was cancer. She wasn't too concerned. She wasn't but I was really concerned. That has probably been a little part of the "fragile" feeling too. In the back of my mind I can't help but think what if Angie has cancer along with everything else. The growth had grown about 25% more since 5 months ago so I am praying that the results will come back benign in 10 days.

Friday we went to see Dr. Rosemond again to get the ultrasound on Hogan. It was the usually appointment with him. We were greeted by the nicest sonographer we could have ever asked for at his office. She has been so kind to us through all of this. She did her initial measurements before Dr. Rosemond came into the room and looked at Hogan. He looked for a while studying the things that he has been watching since the November 18th visit. It always brings back bad memories when we are in his office now but he has been great to us. He has taken extra time with us and answered every question we have ever asked. When he was done taking his look, he told us what he saw. He still saw the heart problems but there were a couple of other things that he saw that weren't "normal". It was a good "not normal" for a Trisomy baby! Hogan was 3 weeks behind in development at our last visit. This is normal for Trisomy babies. They usually slow down and don't develop normally after 20 weeks. The unusual thing was that Hogan was only a couple of weeks now! He is growing better than most with his condition. There was one other thing that was a miracle to me. Dr. Rosemond had told us of a problem that hurt me to think about for Hogan that I couldn't really get out of my mind over the past couple of months along with others but he didn't mention it this time so I specifically asked him about it. He told us that it actually looked better now... he said it looked pretty normal now! That was not the only thing that he told us. He told us that not only did he think that our chance was pretty good for a live birth but that he thinks that Hogan might live for a few days!! He did obviously say that he can't guarantee anything for sure but that from what he saw on his ultrasound that he was optimistic! Angie and I both had tears of joy in our eyes when he told us all of these things. We are so thankful. I am almost nervous to get excited about it because I fear it won't turn out the way he thinks but... praise God for the hope!

We have gone from almost no hope in November of a live birth to a chance for a live birth in January. We are now hearing that we have a chance that we might be able to bring Hogan home with us. WOW! He did tell us that with Trisomy 18 we will not know a lot until Hogan enters the world but we continue to hope and pray that he enters the world alive and that we have a chance to spend some time with him. We will be so thankful for every moment. Isn't it interesting that we feel this way about Hogan. Isn't this the way we should feel about every relationship we have in this world? I know I will soak up every moment with Hogan. I am so thankful for everyday on this earth. I am overwhelmed that God has blessed us so much!

Funny thing today...I was about to take a shower mid morning when I cranked up my "tennis mix" on my ipod. I know thinking about me dancing before I take a shower isn't a pretty mental image but at least I did have my clothes on at the time! If you know anything about my music taste then you know it is anything and everything! I picked up my little princess Lily and started dancing to the song "Brickhouse". It wasn't long before Noah came running into the bathroom to see what the fuss was all about and joined us dancing. Of course, playing basketball years ago at Dublin High, I have a love for "black music". One of my sister's majored in piano performance at UGA so I like that music too. I also lived most of my life in middle Georgia so I have to like Country! So we went from Soulja Boy, Wild Cherry and the Stones to Darius Rucker's song "Alright". I was singing his song "Alright" beautifully while dancing with Noah and Lily when I realized that not only do I like the flow of the song but I love the words to that song too. It basically talks about being "Alright" with simple blessings and not having to have the finest or best. When I hear the song and its words my mind thinks about the fact that if you are a christian that you will be "Alright" no matter what happens in life. You can have family tragedy, you can lose your job, you can lose your car, you can lose all worldly things but if you are a believer you can't have your faith taken from you. If you have a chance to listen to it check it out, you will know what I mean and if not, just ask me and I will sing it for you! We have so much to be thankful! Life could be so much worse. We are so excited that we have been given hope of spending time with Hogan!

FRAGILE - Handle with Care!

2010-02-01T22:39:00.002-05:00

Angie went to the doctor on Friday and got to hear Hogan's heartbeat again! Noah and Lily were there too! I could listen to Hogan's heartbeat all day. We are going to get another ultrasound on Friday of this week. The images and measurements from this ultrasound used for the meeting with our doctors in a couple of weeks. Dr. Rosemond wants us to plan out everything so that when this time comes we will not have to make quick decisions that haven't been thought through ahead of time. I am thankful that they are taking the time to do this. I am also so thankful that so many people are praying for Hogan and our family. I know it is the reason that I can put words down on this computer. It is amazing the peace and the strength that God has given us because of those prayers and words of encouragement. If you are reading this blog you have probably already been praying for Hogan, thank you.

There is one thing that really changed about the way I view life because of Hogan's condition and that is just how fragile life is to me right now.

For your life is like the morning fog- it's here a little while, then it's gone. James 4:14

I did my share of crying and crying out to God the week of Hogan's test result in private but I never really let Angie see me break down until the Friday night when we got back to Athens after Thanksgiving.

It is something that I know and have known all of my life. I have read about it and heard it preached many times but the fact that life is so precious and it can be gone in an instant had never really impacted me like it does right now. It is hard to explain but my biggest fear now if God doesn't provide Hogan with the miracle of life is that I will lose someone else. It is almost like ok God, if you are going to take Hogan into Heaven now, then please don't take anyone else right now! It makes Angie's, Noah's and Lily's life seem more fragile than ever to me. It is amazing that just in the past 9 weeks since finding out about Hogan's condition that we have had a couple of scares with both of our children and now Angie is going to see a specialist next week to see about a health issue that continues to bother me.

One evening in December I got home from the office to find Noah not feeling well. He just didn't act like he usually does. I asked him if he was ok and he told me that his head hurt. Then a few minutes later it was his back, then his legs etc. etc. It wasn't long before I realized that he was having an allergic reaction to something as his eyes began to swell. We already knew he was allergic to eggs, milk, cheese, nuts, chocolate etc. but this time we weren't sure what has caused this to happen. When we checked Noah into the emergency room at St. Mary's he was having trouble breathing and was breaking out all over. We got him back to an ER room and the Dr's and nurses and myself couldn't hold him down for the IV so they had to get a board to strap him down so that he would be still enough for the needle. If you are a parent then you know the feeling when your child is screaming for you to help him and you can't. I had to watch him scream your name asking for help with tears pouring down his face and get so upset that he was sick. I know Noah was wondering why I had to let him out of my arms so that these strangers dressed in all white would strap him down and put a needle into his arm that caused pain. It hurt me so bad to hear Noah cry out my name in need of help knowing that I could do nothing but pray for him and trust the doctors that had been given a gift. I knew that the doctors had to give him the medicine to heal him and make him better but Noah didn't understand. I think that we are going through a similar time in our life. We don't understand why we are hurting or why this is happening but we know that God is good and that God will take care of us. He is the great physician. He can heal all pain.

It was only a few weeks later that Noah was running around having fun at his "grandma's" (my mothers) house. We were about to leave to go home when Noah came running out of my mother's bedroom full speed and accidentally ran over Lily. All Angie and I heard was a big BAM and then screaming followed. Lily had been knocked backwards and hit her head on the wood floor. I got Lily out of my mothers arms to comfort her but it wasn't but a second when I realized she wasn't crying anymore. I pulled her off of my chest to look at her and her head fell forward. She was out! She was not moving at all. I gave her to Angie and we both began to run toward the door to leave for the hospital. It was probably only 4 or 5 seconds but it felt like eternity before she regained consciousness. We called our pediatrician and did the necessary checks and before long Lily was back to her normal self! Again, reminding me that life is fragile and that we can never take anything for granted or any time with family and friends.

If I had a dollar for every time that I kissed my son or daughter on the cheek I could have retired yesterday! Although I know that life is really no more fragile today than it was on November 18th but it just feels that way to me right now.

looking through a different lense

2010-01-26T20:40:00.006-05:00

I purchased our lots in the Oconee Hill Cemetary today. Of course, the main reason for purchasing now was so that we would have this decision behind us if Hogan doesn't live long. It is something that has been a very important decision for me. I wanted the place that my little boy might be put to rest to be special. It doesn't really matter about where I will be buried but this is my son. If you are reading this and have gone through something like this you probably know how I feel, especially if you are a dad. I know that I probably won't be able to buy my son a train set or a puzzle to play with or take him to a ballgame. I feel the only thing I can do on this earth is to make his resting place as honorable and peaceful as can be. I know his soul will not be there. It is important to me because his life, no matter how long is just as important as any other life to me. He has already been such a blessing to our family. I have been over to the cemetary at least a dozen times in the past month trying to find the right area. It was a blessing that a new part of Oconee Hill had just opening up. We got to pick one of the first few lots in this area which is a small section and surrounded by beautiful old hardwoods. I can't explain my emotions but the fact that this decision is over helped to let me realize just how serious this little life is to me. The closer we get to April more excited I am getting at the thought of getting to meet Hogan. This was the case with Noah and Lily but this time I know this is our last pregnancy, so it makes it even more special. I was really looking forward to this third child because I thought God was allowing me to really enjoy the birth of Hogan because I didn't get to enjoy Lily's quite as much because my dad was passing away about the same time she was born in 2008. The irony is that I will cherish this birth and enjoy every second because of having the knowlege of Hogan's condition. I pray that God will allow us to the chance to meet him with a live birth. We are very thankful for another week with Hogan alive in Angie.

There are so many images that I will already never forget and there are many ways that we have been able to see God working through the past couple of months. This is one of them...

When Angie and I had a little time to soak in what the doctor had told us that Monday in November we both knew that no matter when and no matter what the condition, we wanted to make sure we captured Hogan with picture images. It was a hard thing to plan because the doctor told us that our child could pass away any day up until delivery and that many babies with Trisomy 18 didn't make it full term. Angie's baby doctor told us that the way we would find out that he was no longer with us was if Angie didn't feel that baby kick for a few hours. I honestly wish I hadn't heard her say that because now, I always wonder when the last time Hogan kicked!? It is something Angie can feel but I have to wonder about until she mentions him kicking or I just come out and ask her! just needed to come get checked for a heart beat if Hogan didn't kick for a few hours and then if there was no heartbeat then she would send us to St. Mary's. Well, how do you schedule a photographer to be "on call" when you have no idea when the birth is going to take place over a 5 month span? Also, if you did happen to get a photographer to volunteer to take the pictures, would the photographer be comfortable taking pictures if Hogan was no longer physically alive? I knew that I had to find someone or at least have a plan. If you have ever been anywhere with me or spent much time with me at all then you know there has to be a plan!

I knew a good friend of mine in middle georgia that I hoped would agree to take the pictures. He has always been a great friend and is a great photographer. I told him about the situation and he said "whatever you need me to do, I will do it". That was such a relief to find a friend that would be there if needed to take the pictures of Hogan and the moment. My only concern about this was that he would have to drive a long time to get here and if something happened quickly he might not get here in time or just in case he was out of town or unable to make it for some reason when the time came. So, I wanted to have "plan B"! I wanted someone that lived in Athens or really close to Athens. Angie and I talked about it and we thought of a friend that might be willing to do this for us. I emailed her to see if she would be willing to take pictures for us at the hospital. I hated to put her in an awkward postion because I knew this was a very different situation.

After I sent the email off I noticed some similarities in a few of the pictures and videos that I had seen online while reading about Trisomy 18. The letters NILMDTS were on a couple of the photos and a video that I had watched. I googled NILMDTS to see if I could find some information. I found out that NILMDTS stands for an organization called "Now I lay me down to sleep". I read about what this ministry was all about and it sounded like it might be just what we were wanting! I emailed a representative in Atlanta and told him about Hogan and asked if he could take pictures of Hogan when the time came. It wasn't long before I got an email back saying that he couldn't do it but there was a local person here in Athens that might could help. He gave me her contact number and within and hour I had talked to her and she basically said she was sorry about what we were going through but that she would be there for us to take the pictures when we needed her! She went into detail about how she would handle the things. What a blessing! She was just what we wanted! She is trained to do this type of thing. She is a part time nurse at St. Mary's where we will have our baby and also an incredible baby photographer. How amazing is that?! She gave me her cell phone and told me to call her on the way to the hospital. I pray that we make a happy call to her in mid April!

I would have never known about an incredible group like NILMDTS. There are so many good people in our world with amazing talents and amazing hearts! Hopefully we will get lots of other pictures later in Hogan's life but if a miracle doesn't happen it is such a blessing to have photographers that donate there time and talent to do this because these images may be the only visual images here on earth that we will have.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QJF0Cs4f9s

This is a video that was put together for Trisomy 13 and Trisomy 18 families. It was this video that led me to Teresa, our local NILMDTS volunteer. This video is filled with images of Trisomy 13 and Trisomy 18 babies. These two conditions have a similar fate but a few different characterstics.

Hogan, my hero

Valentine's Day! It's all about the HEART!....

Wishing you a very Magical Christmas!

Dreaming.

Getting closer...

It's about the One....

Developing a Warrior Mentality...

"Remembering the Ones"

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions....

It's Angie's Birthday today!

Happy Father's Day!

WeeCare Ministry Information.....

and the thunder rolls.....

Memorial Day 2010

It's been over a month now...where do we go from here?

Mother's Day 2010

Remembering the ones...

Memories of Hogan's journey.....

Thank you Hogan, thank you friends, thank you God....

Hogan Sayer Dominy

Hogan, you are an amazing warrior!

"baby Hogan"

Hogan, the warrior with the big Heart!

A little Miracle from God...

The Heart of a Warrior

Hogan's Heart

Hogan is on a mission! Thank God!

It's a good day so far!

Hogan's heroes

Quick update - Monday, April 12th

Hogan is very tired tonight.....

quick update - Sunday, April 11th

Hang in there Hogan!

G-Day in Athens, GA

On a Mission.....

Hogan is 1 Week old today!

Hogan is still alive and kicking!

"no major concerns" from Dr. Morales on the results from Hogan's ultrasound!

Hogan continues to battle!

April 7th.... afternoon update!

April 6th .... Good Night Hogan

April 6th afternoon update

April 5th

Day 4 for Hogan!

Hogan enjoyed his Easter Sunday

Hogan is a true warrior

Day 2 for Hogan!!

Happy Birthday Hogan!

HOGAN IS HERE!!!!!!

It's almost time for Hogan!!

Dear Hogan

"I am so glad you are here"

April 5th or earlier....

the story behind the name "HOGAN"... and a quick update on things!

it won't be long now...

March Madness

Extensive Care

hogan Name Meaning and HistoryIrish: Anglicized form of Gaelic Ó hÓgáin ‘descendant of Ógán’, a personal name from a diminutive of óg‘young’, also ‘young warrior’.

hogan Name Meaning and History

Hogan's Heart

Why God? Why?

FRAGILE - Handle with Care!

looking through a different lense

hogan Name Meaning and History
Irish: Anglicized form of Gaelic Ó hÓgáin ‘descendant of Ógán’, a personal name from a diminutive of óg‘young’, also ‘young warrior’.